Reconsidering Amea

RH I’ve had a recurring dream since I was in my late teens. It’s bizarre and it goes away for, sometimes, a month, a year, but it always comes back and sticks around a few nights. I’ll have to tell you about it in person sometime. It’s crazy and, I think, post-apocalyptic, if I’m interpreting what I’m seeing right. Regardless, there is a whole city on fire, so…yeah…RH And I always wake screaming and covered in sweat at the exact same place in the dream.

Nyctophilia Raven I used to have a recurring dream when I was a kid. It wasn’t a nightmare, though. And I have dreams that have chapters – I’ll dream one chapter, and then a few months or years later, I’ll dream the next chapter… but this past year, this is the first  time I’ve had a recurring theme of being SHOT, and had it be so realistic that I wake up panicked. I normally don’t have nightmares. And even getting shot was just shocking, not traumatic to the point of hysterics. It was… not knowing if she was ok, if the neighbors had heard the shot and actually come… people so often ignore what they aren’t looking at. I wasn’t upset about dying again… or even how. I was terrified that she hadn’t lived.

Nyctophilia Raven I think I can count the number of nightmares I’ve had on one hand, before this being shot to death thing started.RH It’s the only nightmare I think I’ve ever had, actually. That Amea dream sequence is better than anything Hollywood is putting out these days. Now I just want to write! lol

Nyctophilia Raven I’m not sure I’m happy about my dreams being better than movies. It doesn’t really help. lol

RH Ok, the first and second dream seem, to me, to share a connection beyond the gunshots… It’s just a tickle in the back of my brain, but these are connected, somehow…

Nyctophilia Raven If you can figure it out, please, PLEASE let me know. Because this is all totally BEYOND fucked up. I notice that the second and third dream both had my ex, Scott, the heroin addict, making an appearance. I haven’t been involved with him for nearly five years now.

RH Scott and the Meth Man, even the Husband in the first dream are incidental, I think. They are representative of something… This is crazy, never interpreted dreams before. Is there someone new or newer in your life whom you’ve quickly grown to trust who may not be worthy of that trust? Trust seems to be a theme.

Nyctophilia Raven Honestly, no… everyone in my life is a person that’s been in my life for several years. Longer than the dreams have been happening by at least one year or more.

Nyctophilia Raven Even weirder – I’m less stressed, I’m happier, than I’ve EVER been before.

RH Just finished “BigBrotherMachine” and, so far, all of them have trust as a linking thread. People who should’ve been trustworthy, husbands, cops, a fellow rebel…but they aren’t. There’s more to it, I just haven’t spotted it, yet.

RH BBM is missing a psychotic type character. Something is missing from your memories of that dream, I think. I’m going to keep thinking on this, but right now, I feel as if you’re being warned of something, something you can prevent, maybe? If you remember anything more about the Big Brother Machine dream sequence, let me know. I’d ask you to try and dream it again, with your husband watching over you, but I know how traumatic these types of dreams can be. Also, try to look in you memory for shiny things that stand out over all the other things in the dreams, not just the Lion and Wolf in the one dream.

Nyctophilia Raven Big Brother Machine is missing a lot because I never wrote that one down, so a year later, I’m having to dredge it up in bits and pieces. I honestly don’t remember it all anymore. I think the “world government” and its policing force is the psychotic in that dream though. The depths of control I remember feeling subject to by the world government in that dream was very, VERY Orwellian.

Nyctophilia Raven Amea was shiny. She had a light inside her – not one you could see with your eyes, but you couldn’t help but feel it was there.

Nyctophilia Raven I don’t remember anything shiny from the cop dream. Big brother machine, everything was very sepia-toned.

Nyctophilia Raven Also… you might be right about trust being the theme… I don’t have any. It’s a huge issue for me.

RH Ah, perhaps the dreams are trying to warn you about that lack of trust. It’s very possible that your subconscious is trying to show you that your feelings on trust could attract into your life the very thing you are trying to avoid/fear, distrustful people. You trusted in Amea, and she in you, in the one dream. In the Wolf/Lion dream, I think your trust was placed in the wrong people and you were so focused on the journey and the boredom that you failed to realize the pursuers were your rescuers. It has a ring of “The Trail of Tears” to it. If you had trusted Scott to deal with the man leaving your house with the gun, you would have gotten the answers you needed and not wound up shot. There’s just too much missing to properly speculate on the BBM dream, maybe you shouldn’t have trusted yourselves to remain concealed within a civilization gone made. Perhaps, you should’ve hidden within nature and put your trust in the land, rather than the people who eventually reported you to the security forces?

Nyctophilia Raven That… actually sounds… logical. Huh. You’re good at this! Thank you. I’ve been trying to work on my trust issues, but… maybe I need a little help.

Nyctophilia Raven Do you mind if I copy this convo into my blog so I can share it with someone who is in a position to help me with this particular issue?

RH As a child, I was very good at…’reading’ the emotions of the people around me. It was disturbing to me in large groups, couldn’t keep a handle on my emotional state. Some of that that I lost in childhood seems to have been returning these past few years.

RH I don’t mind, at all.

Nyctophilia Raven I had that same issue – only mine never went away… it’s probably where most of my trust issues actually stem from, tbh. And thank you.

RH Thank you, you are the one sharing yourself through your dreams, m’lady.

Nyctophilia Raven I didn’t really have a choice… I needed to write these down… especially the last one. I couldn’t leave it in my head, it was doing to much damage there.

Nyctophilia Raven Better out than in.

RH Well, I hope our conversation helps some.

Nyctophilia Raven It did.  Thank you.

RH You’re most welcome.


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