Dosojin – First Contact

Sooooo… last night (this morning?) was a really… odd night.

Two dreams – one dream that had a phase where I was dreaming I was awake, so bear with me here.

First Dream

I’m being attacked by an Aswang. Well, stabbed by what looks like a sting-ray tail spike, by said Aswang. I try to scream to wake up. It takes a bit. I wake up, and my husband says, “Bad dream?” “Yeah, I dreamed I was attacked by an Aswang. I don’t get it. I’m not pregnant. I can’t GET pregnant.” Hubby says, “That is weird. I had bad dreams too.” I start to worry that the nightmare wasn’t really an Aswang. I keep thinking that it’s a nightmare sent by my drowned wraith. I get upset. I really don’t want to blame her. I pull out a pendulum to ask, but I realize I’m thinking so much that it was her that sent the dream, I’m affecting my answers. I put the pendulum down, and try to go back to sleep. I keep worrying. I don’t want to have to put her vessel in cinnamon. I hate doing things like that.

Second Dream

I’m on this forum. On this thread, actually. And someone has replied to my comments about CH’s Bag of All Tricks – they have one, they were thinking of using it but weren’t sure how it works, and were writing to tell me they appreciated how informative the post was about how the energy works. They also liked the fact that I was poking fun at the Code Words, because on CH’s forum, people treat the code words like they’re gospel, like they’re some mystical language that only CH knows.

This Morning’s Results

I got up, made my chai, and went looking for a pendulum. (Yeah, I do not keep one by the bed… I have cats. lol) I sat down, and asked about the nightmare. I asked if I’d been attacked. I hadn’t. I asked if the dream was a sending. I was told yes. I asked if it was my drowned wrath that sent it. I was told no. (Thank You Gods). I asked if the dream was a WARNING. I was told YES. I asked if it had been sent by my Dosojin (even though I didn’t see an older couple in the dream, they’ve sent me warnings before, and even then, I’ve never seen them). The answer was YES.

So… now I have to figure out what the image of an aswang with a stingray tail spike stabbing me means. I know what the rest of the dream means. I don’t entirely trust my drowned wraith because she’s got attitude. Now that I’m awake, that just seems… silly. But clearly I have some subconscious stuff going on. I’m going to work with her tomorrow night (tonight’s my rededication ritual), so I can get past whatever’s in my head that’s causing this angst.

Also… I need to spend some time this morning with my dosojin. I’m going to make up some chamomile tea to drink with them.

-Raven (off to research Aswang)

 

WELL… the article I found was certainly interesting.

That stingray tail? It’s used to defend AGAINST Aswang – it kills them. So… that puts a new twist on things. Aswang are solitary hunters… they don’t share territory. Being attacked in that way suggests that there’s a territorial issue going on here… which explains why I fixated on the WORD Aswang, and the IMAGE of the stingray tail. The Aswang itself, I didn’t see very clearly… like dreams do, I just KNEW what it was – though honestly the fact that they’re shapeshifters means I probably wouldn’t have seen a clear form, just because I would have seen the shifter energies, which always confuses my eyes in dreams.

It’s interesting that Aswang aren’t always perceived negatively. Aswang are shapeshifters, and can go out during the day, and when they do, they look and act perfectly normal. They have emotions. They make friends. They fall in love. They can talk, in fact they like to have conversations with people. All the stories say they’re just like the townspeople around them – until nighttime, when they transform into their hunting form. The people they connect with are always protected – Aswang never feed on their friends, neighbors, family, or loved ones. They also don’t feed on their loved one’s loved ones. It also seems that becoming an Aswang is an STD – if an Aswang marries, then after the wedding night, their partner is also an Aswang. They’re comparable to vampires as hunters, they have similar weaknesses – garlic, salt, religious artifacts/weapons, decapitation. They can’t step on holy ground. They’re also repelled by certain Philippine amulets – the red and black beaded bracelets on baby’s wrists are to repel Aswangs, and there’s a special oil made by Philippine shamans which apparently boils when they’re nearby. There’s two ways to spot an Aswang during the day – if you look them in the eyes and your image is upside down, they’re an Aswang (likewise, you can bend over and look between your legs, and in their eyes you’ll be right side up); the second way is to look at their lips. If they don’t have the divot in the center of their top lip (the philtrum), they’re an Aswang. Like vampires, Aswang also really only hunt outsiders – the easily missed. Unlike vampires, they don’t drink blood, and obviously they’re daywalkers. Their food source is kinda icky though… they eat the hearts and livers of corpses and unborn babies (some of them have proboscis that they use to steal babies straight out of the womb, but that’s a specific type of Aswang). It’s interesting that in the dream, the Aswang was stabbing me in and around the liver area, though clearly it wasn’t trying to feed on me. I’m not a corpse anymore.

Actually, that brings up a whole new thought. I wonder if the work I’ve been doing to come to terms with the piece of death I now carry with me in my heart isn’t part what the dream was discussing? Something to ask my Dosojin when I meditate with them today.

So… two possibilities… some kind of territorial dispute; something to do with death energies.

I’m going to take some time to wake up, and then I’ll see what my Dosojin have to say.

-Raven

 

First Dream

I’m being attacked by an Aswang. Well, stabbed by what looks like a sting-ray tail spike, by said Aswang. I try to scream to wake up. It takes a bit. I wake up, and my husband says, “Bad dream?” “Yeah, I dreamed I was attacked by an Aswang. I don’t get it. I’m not pregnant. I can’t GET pregnant.” Hubby says, “That is weird. I had bad dreams too.” I start to worry that the nightmare wasn’t really an Aswang. I keep thinking that it’s a nightmare sent by my drowned wraith. I get upset. I really don’t want to blame her. I pull out a pendulum to ask, but I realize I’m thinking so much that it was her that sent the dream, I’m affecting my answers. I put the pendulum down, and try to go back to sleep. I keep worrying. I don’t want to have to put her vessel in cinnamon. I hate doing things like that.

 

So I just got finished with my gratitude offering and meditation with my Dosojin. She is very definitely a SHE – this amazing elder, warm and huggy – really, she reminds me of my idea of a perfect grandmother type. She’s very pleasant to be with… though she can be QUITE blunt when I’m not getting the hint. And when she’s blunt, she speaks with a bit of asperity. lol I guess I can be pretty frustrating.

After spending a little time just being with her, getting to know her energies, I finally got around to asking about the dream. We sat and watched the dream together, and I paused it in places where I had questions. I asked her about the possible territorial dispute. Her first comment was to remind me that sometimes, the characters you see in dreams are echoes of yourself. Then she asked me what parts of myself and my personal territory, do I have a dispute with. We talk again about me walling off the death energies in my soulscape. Her final comments were, “When did you last feed? What do you feed on, now that you’ve returned?” Well… I haven’t been HUNGRY. She says that’s because I’ve been eating… the parts of myself that, when I merged with them, vanished from my consciousness. She asked me, “What will you do when that resource runs out?” I answered that I had assumed that, because of my previous experiences with just KNOWING what I feed on, when the time came, I would experience that again. She told me that because part of what I was eating was the aspect of my spirit that is the feeder, I might not get that Knowing when the time comes. I’ll still have the need to feed, though, so I’d better figure it out now…. and stop eating myself.

So… the warning is that I’m attacking myself, and also that I’m walling off pieces of myself.

So, DC Tz, SDC E, and now my Dosojin, have all talked to me about the fact that I’ve walled off the death that I carry. Three warnings. Time to act. Now I just have to figure out HOW. And, of course, find a nutritional snack… without a clue about what that entails at all.

-Raven

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On the Conjuring Of Wraiths

9/17/17

With dynamic discovery orb in hand, bag of all tricks in my lap, CH’s Big Book of Code Words, and a variety of vessels around me, I spake the magick words (gobbledygoop on the pieces of paper) that would conjure a wraith I could talk to into the bag.

“Hi. Nice to meet you. So… I’ve been dead for awhile, and that means my wraith friends are… elsewhere now. They told me I needed someone new. Would you like to be a part of my household. Keep my stuff and my family safe?”

“NO. GO AWAY.”

“yessirsorrysirbye.”

*sigh* Well alrightythen.

Once again, I spake the magick gobbledygoop to the magick bag.

You ever see those drowned sailors, all covered in green and white? Yeah. That’s the look. I know they’re asexual, but this one looks female. She (yeah, I’m gonna be stubborn about this – if it looks like a chick, even if it’s not, unless it tells me some other pronoun to use I’m gonna say she – and wraiths honestly don’t gaf so She it is – as a nonbinary person, I fully understand that appearances do not mean anything but when I’m working with spirits and entities, I use gender appearances to simplify things) has long straight hair. Green hair. Tangles. Pasty greenwhite skin. And she is PISSED.

“ummmm… Hello. So… you know what… E, can you talk to her for me, please? OTHANKYOUGODS.” I wait a few. She looks at me impatiently. “Sorry, I was waiting? Um… do you want to be bound for this household?”

She sighs and gives me a look. Yeah… that look. She’s going to be fun. lol

“Well, ok… what vessel do you want?”

The Evil Eye Door Pendant promptly plunges from the third shelf on the book case next to me, and lands on my ankle bone. OW. It’s like, half a pound of glass, this thing. OWWWWWW.

“Ok then. Hope on in.”

I rub my ankle with one hand while I hold her vessel and the DD orb in the other and say the other magick babble. I feel the energy shift and suck into the Evil Eye pendant. When it stabilizes, I wrap a piece of paper with “Wraith – …” on it around the vessel, shove her into the Bag to settle for the next twelve hours for a permanent binding. Rub my ankle some more. I chose her name rather facetiously. Yeah, I know they don’t have names, but… when you’re binding something using someone else’s tools, being SUPER specific is smart. So even the nameless ones get nicknames to help focus the work. That bag is not me. I don’t trust it to be specific. It’s a bag.

 

All the other conjures were family that had already been with me awhile… they were… considerably less challenging. In fact, they were EASY. She was really the only PITA. lol She’s going to be fun to work with.

Update 9/18/17

Was talking to my partner-in-crime/bestie/exApprenticeNowMaster Telomar today, and another wraith showed up and DEMANDED to be channeled to me. He was… really fierce. He smelled of brimstone, and he’s burnt to a crisp. He also informed me that if I needed to call him anything, I could call him … Which made me laugh because… chauffeurs and butlers go by that kind of name. Still, it does kinda make sense… he wants to be the household protector, the property guardian. While the drowned wraith will clearly be challenging to work with, she’s also very focused on personal protection (I shudder to think what made her both drowned and have that as her focus – but you Do Not Ask Some Questions), so having a second wraith focused on the property (and willing to work with the Fu) is awesome.

When I conjured him, his energy was so heavy that I actually wondered if he isn’t some type of demon wraith, rather than a human one. It also took a LONG time for his energy to stop pouring through me and into his chosen vessel.

Well… that’s that then. Two wraiths. Both with personality. This will be fun! \

-Raven

The Misadventures of Raven & Family

(TITLE COURTESY OF KITSUNE – TY!)

So… after nearly ten years with CH… I… kinda died. I mean, not in a fleshy way, but trust me… I was definitely not here in my skinsuit. I was absolutely in the Wastes… I was dead.

Which meant that… when I came back… all those nifty friends I’d collected over my ten years were GONE.

I actually felt really relieved, tbh… I just felt like… there was too much them for too little me. The guilt was kinda exhausting.

However, as I’ve been working with my Demon Commander E, he’s brought it to my attention that some of them would be beneficial. So… last night, after my work with him, but before my work with my Hellborn DC Tz, I sat down with all their tags (forget finding all those vessels – I just had to go by my notes), and a pendulum, and began to ask who was still around. The answer was, not surprisingly, no one. E nudged me. “Shouldn’t you be asking who WANTS to be around? You already KNEW they were all gone.” Duh.

I picked up my trusty pendulum again, and started asking who wanted to come back.

It was a very short list… but while there were a couple surprises, it’s mostly who I thought it would be. Neither of my wraiths wanted to stay, but they both INSISTED I needed to get a wraith into the household. The psyvamp and incubus sent to me by a client (she’d adopted them from TEC and just wasn’t able to bond) stayed, but the Beansidhe that she sent me did not. One of my sanguine vampires from CH stayed (I was really happy about that… A was a true blessing when he arrived, and he was the first spirit I ever worked with who understood I was autistic, and how I needed to be treated because of that). One of my Watchtowers from CH stayed (the East one, go figure), but the rest weren’t interested. Neither were any of the Lares. I was honestly surprised the East Watchtower spirit stayed… he and the other watchtowers and lares were the last spirits to arrive from CH, and they arrived after I was dead, so they never even came out of their packages. None of the dragons stayed. My Enochian angel stayed, but none of my other angels. One of the six elementals that DLM conjured for me stayed, but the others had moved on. A winter court sidhe conjured by Kyle and Wife (WolvesDen store, OOB now) agreed to come back… and one last CH spirit – a dosojin. (That one surprised the heck out of me.)

Needless to say, I spent most of the night using CH’s Dynamic Discovery Orb and Bag of All Tricks to conjure those who wanted to come home again, and to bind them to their chosen vessels. I also welcomed two new wraiths – a drowned woman (fairy wraith), and a burnt man (demonic wraith)… they will be really interesting to work with.

I used the bag and the orb because I’m not ready to do my own conjures again, just yet. I can give the energy to the kind of bindings that CH’s tools do, but I just don’t have the strength yet to be able to do my own work.

Which is why my Cecaelia has not been reconjured yet. I made her a promise that I would conjure her myself, when I was ready. So… that’s on hold. I’m probably going to celebrate either Samhain or the Winter Solstice with her conjure, depending on how I’m doing. I would like it to be sooner, but… I won’t rush myself. I won’t risk her or myself in an imperfect conjure and binding. I also have some Quetzals who want to join the household. The Naga don’t seem to be terribly interested, and I’m fine with that. They’re… lighter than I need right now. (I know, Quetzals are even lighter, but… they understand balance, and Naga are… less flexible.) I haven’t had any Ubi approach me, but… my feeling is that they’re waiting for the right time. They are a very patient people.

So… From three to fourteen. Well, and three pairs of Fu and a Guardian Construct that’s been with me for… wow… I honestly can’t remember when I made her. Huh.

What follows in this thread is a kind of diary. I have my two DC’s who are keeping me fairly busy right now, but as I settle into a schedule with them, E has plans for me to begin a course in magickal basics to refresh myself… and part of those daily exercises will include spending time with one or more of the household. As I get into the swing of things, I’ll be wanting a record of how we work together, what spirits/entities like to work most on what types of magickal activities.

So… I guess you can read this… but I’m not promising anything at all useful for you. It’s really just for me.

New Moon Personal Dedication Ritual: September 20, 2017

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This is the ritual I will be doing for myself. I’m sharing it because you might like to take pieces of it for your own workings. Below are the links from which I sourced the ritual, in their original form – you will see that I have done some considerable adaptation for the Call of the Rising Gods, because the ritual was not quite right for me, did not express quite the right energies I am seeking for this.

The New Moon occurs at 12:30am CST September 20. The moon will be in Virgo, and the emphasis of the energy is in creating a clean slate.

The rituals I borrowed from are from the following sources, where you can read them in their original:
http://theisticsatanism.com/rituals/standard/banishing.html
http://theisticsatanism.com/rituals/standard/names.html
https://ahrimanblood.wordpress.com/2008/08/22/left-hand-path-banishing-ritual/
http://theisticsatanism.com/rituals/standard/call5gods.html
https://www.thoughtco.com/self-dedication-ritual-2562868
http://fuckyeahitchywitch.tumblr.com/post/2730204004

Combination Ritual for the New Moon – Cleansing and Clearing of the Temples; Call to the Rising Gods of Our Age; Self-Dedication Ritual; Domestic Familiar Animal Call; Gratitude, Offerings, and Temple Release

Keep in mind that this ritual is designed as a template, and you can adapt it or adjust it to meet your own needs or those of the tradition you have created.

You should perform this ritual skyclad, if at all possible. Find a place that is quiet, private, and free of distractions. Turn off your cell phone and send the kids out to play if you have to.

Begin by grounding yourself. Find your inner peace, and become good and relaxed. Shut out all the things from your mundane life that distract you—forget for a while about paying the bills, your son’s baseball practice, and whether or not you fed the cat. Focus only on yourself, and the tranquility you’re entitled to.

Part 1 – The Adverse Pentacle

A’Ni (Palms to crown). (I AM)
Malkuth (Palms to root – See balanced light rising from below the earth, through my body’s chakras and channels, and out my crown, into eternity). (THE KINGDOM)
Ve-Gevurah (Touch right shoulder, then left hip). (AND THE POWER)
Ve-Gedulah (Touch right hip, then left shoulder). (AND THE GLORY)
Le-Olahm (Palms to root). (FOREVER)
Ve Nahon (OR Baphomestis) (Namaste position at solar plexus or heart). (THIS IS TRUTH)

Part 2 – The Quarter Calls (Note – which corner you start in may change according to your ritual purposes – I start in the East, because my personal sphere is Knowledge.)

Stand in your starting quarter, and (if you like) ring a bell 9 times. (I like ceremony, and I love bells, so I’m gonna do this every freaking time. YAY BELLS!)

At each quarter, draw the adverse pentacle of Earth (Bottom, top right, middle left, middle right, top left, bottom). Then, step forward, and empowering your pentagram, call out to the quarter King.

EAST: I Call to Welcome Lucifer, the bringer of light and knowledge!
NORTH: I Call to Welcome Belial, he who has no master, ruler of material wealth and power!
WEST: I Call to Welcome Leviathan, crocodile of the deep, carnal animal of chaos!
SOUTH: I Call to Welcome Iblis, he who bows down to no people, and accepts no belief blindly!

As you move from quarter to quarter, draw your sphere as you go. Remember to return to your starting quarter to complete the sphere.

When your sphere is complete, stand in the center and say:

“I call to welcome Set, who nightly slays Apep. By destroying the imp of chaos, I create freedom for myself. I have the freedom to create any Order I desire for myself, and I have the freedom to destroy it. I have the power to change at Will, and through change I can Become. Around me flame my pentagrams, the stars of force and fire. Within my breast dwells the Eternal One, the Infinite and Immortal Star! A’Ni Chaos*!”

(*You will need to choose a different signifier – I say “I Am Chaos” but your own power word is better. Google can help. There is no Hebrew word for chaos, so they say it using the English pronunciation.)

Repeat Part 1 (The Adverse Pentacle).

Call to the Rising Gods of Our Age

When you begin saying the call, you should already be facing your altar, facing the main direction for the ritual (west for a self-initiation ritual, possibly a different direction for another type of ritual).

Visualize yourself standing inside the central pentagon of a large point-down pentagram whose bottom point is located directly beneath you, below the ground where you are standing. Visualize the five gods as residing at and beyond the points of the pentagram, the energies of all five radiating from their respective points into the central pentagon. Visualize Hecate, the Queen of Hell, in an underground cave at the bottom point of the pentagram, Her dark feminine energy pervading the entire world. Visualize Prometheus above you with a torch, stealing fire from heaven, at the top right point of the pentagram. Visualize Ishtar as a fiercely passionate, athletic, tall, shapely but somewhat plump, muscular naked woman standing on the ground, at a distance to your left, in a meadow with trees behind Her, near the gates of an ancient stone city wall, Her energies pervading the entire Earth. Visualize Pan at a distance to your right, also standing on the ground, at the border between a meadow and a pristine forest, His energies pervading the entire Earth too. Visualize Enki above you at the top left point of the pentagram, the twin snakes of knowledge and wisdom wrapped around him in a double helix, the two trees of masculinity and femininity embracing him, the waters of the Tigris and Euphrates rivers pouring from his hands to nourish the world with life, knowledge, and replenishment.

Raising both arms in a gesture of greeting to all five gods, say:

Hail to the rising Gods of this age,
Gods of the world I love!

Pause for a moment, contemplating the things you love about both the natural world and modern civilization.

Then lower your arms, relax, and visualize yourself sinking down into the ground, enveloped and permeated by a dark flame emanating from the center of the Earth. Visualize Hecate as a proud, tall, sexily feminine, three faced woman in a cave, holding the keys to the gateway behind her, presiding over an army of the dead, her sacred hounds, and Her demon children. Looking down to the cave, through her gateway, and into the dark flame, say:

Hail, Hecate!
Lady of the crossroads!
Goddess of knowledge, magick, and the hidden ways!

Pause for a moment, contemplating Hecate.

Raise your right arm toward the top right point of the pentagram, towards Prometheus, but your left arm should still be extended downward, toward Hecate. With your right hand, make a fist in defiance of ignorance. Then, looking up to Prometheus at the top right point, say:

Hail, Prometheus!
Bringer of fire and knowledge!

Pause for a moment, contemplating Prometheus and the vital role of science and technology in our lives. Unclench your fist, open your fingers and feel a victorious energy flowing through you between Hecate and Prometheus, for They both have won great victories in the modern world.

Then, with your right arm still extended toward Prometheus at the top right point, extend your left arm horizontally to the left, toward your visualization of Ishtar. Both your hands should be open, fingers outstretched. Contemplate Ishtar/Inanna as a Goddess of both the world’s oldest civilization and the modern sexual revolution, neither of which could exist without the gifts of Prometheus. Look to your left and say:

Hail, Ishtar!
Great Goddess of old and of today!
Mother of the free!

Feel the primal, passionate energy of the Goddess of both love and war sweep through you as you call to Her. Pause for a moment, gradually shifting your attention to Ishtar as a Goddess of the larger forces of Nature too, beyond Her manifestations in the human realm. Contemplate both the beauty and the fierceness of the forces of nature here on Earth. Contemplate also your own dependence on Mother Earth. The gifts of Prometheus have changed our relationship to Her in many ways, but we still cannot live without Her, and it would still behoove us to respect Her.

Then, with your left arm still extended horizontally to the left, toward Ishtar, extend your right arm horizontally to the right, toward Pan. Both hands should be open, fingers outstretched. Look to your right and say:

Hail, Pan!
God of the wild!
God of fleshly delight!

Pause for a moment, contemplating Pan and both the beauty and the fierceness of the many kinds of animals and plants here on Earth. Feel the energy of Pan, and feel an erotic energy flowing through you between Pan and the Great Goddess.

Then, with your right arm still extended horizontally to the right, toward Pan, extend your left arm toward Enki at the top left point of the pentagram. With both hands, make a gesture of celebration of your ability to embrace both the pleasures of the flesh and the right to practice alternative religions and spiritualties. Look up at Enki and say:

Hail, Enki!
Bringer of life, wisdom, and replenishment!

Pause for a moment, contemplating Enki. Unclench your hands, extend your fingers, and feel an energy flowing through you between Enki and Pan, the energies of spirit and flesh enlivening each other.

Then, with your left arm still extended toward to the top left point of the pentagram, let your right arm dangle downward. Both hands should now be open, fingers extended. Feel an energy flowing through you between Enki and Hecate, the energy of the drive toward individual freedom, and the energy of various kinds of nonconformists gathering together to challenge popular attitudes. Look down and say:

Hail, Hecate!
Queen of the forsaken realms,
Rising Queen of our world,
Queen of this age!

Pause for a moment, contemplating Hecate again. Visualize the changes in the modern world that show Her hand at work. See those changes progressing.

Then raise both hands, fists clenched, and say:

Gods of the world I love,
May I walk strong before you, an expression of you in all ways!

Pause for a few moments, contemplating the presence of all five rising gods. Then relax and lower your arms.

Simple Self-Dedication Ritual

You will need the following items:

Blessing oil
Salt
A white candle

When you’re ready to proceed, sprinkle the salt on the floor or ground, and stand with your feet upon it.

Light your white candle, and feel the warmth of the flame. Look into the glow of the fire and think about what goals you have for yourself on your spiritual journey. Think about your motivations for performing this self-dedication.

Stand before your altar, and say:

I am a child of the gods, and I ask them to bless me.

Dip your finger into the blessing oil, and with eyes closed, anoint your forehead. Some people do this by tracing a pentagram on the skin with the oil.

Say: May my mind be blessed, so that I can accept the wisdom of the gods.

Anoint the eyelids (be careful here!) and say: May my eyes be blessed, so I can see my way clearly upon this path.

Anoint the tip of your nose with the oil, and say: May my nose be blessed, so I can breathe in the essence of all that is Divine.

Anoint your lips, and say: May my lips be blessed, so I may always speak with honor and respect.

Anoint your chest, and say: May my heart be blessed, so I may love and be loved.

Anoint the tops of your hands, and say: May my hands be blessed, so that I may use them to heal and help others.

Anoint your genital area, and say: May my womb be blessed, so that I may honor the creation of life. (If you’re male, make the appropriate changes here.)

Anoint the soles of your feet, and say: May my feet be blessed, so that I may walk side by side with the Divine.

If you have specific deities you follow, pledge your loyalty to them now. Otherwise, you can use simply “God and Goddess,” or “Mother and Father”.

Say:
Tonight, I pledge my dedication to the God and Goddess. I will walk with them beside me, and ask them to guide me on this journey. I pledge to honor them, and ask that they allow me to grow closer to them. As I will, so it shall be.

Take some time to meditate. Feel the afterglow of the ritual, and feel the energy of the gods around you. You have brought yourself to the attention of the Divine, so they will be keeping an eye on you. Accept the gift of their wisdom.

Domestic Animal Familiar Call

Equipment needed:
Drum,
incense representative of your expected familiar

 

– Find your heart’s rhythm (take your pulse)

– Beat on the drum to the same rhythm as your heart so that the rhythm is “known” to the spirits who might come to you. Continue this for at least five minutes to draw the attention of the animal

– After you have raised the energy and gotten the attention of potential familiars, (and while still drumming), chant in time with your heartbeats (now is a good time to check your pulse, it is probably faster now and you should increase the rhythm):

I call the beast
And the beast calls me
By my will, by divine will
Dance to the beat of my heart
Ancient ones hear me
And bring the Goddess manifest
Fur or fin, scale or feather
Hear my call for a magickal Familiar
Creature of earth, air, wind or water
Come to me, mentor me
I shall care for you and honor you
Blessed be!

– Stop drumming with the last words of the invocation

If your domestic familiar did not join your circle during the call, don’t worry – your domestic familiar may not be who you thought it was, or you may not be ready for them. Your domestic Familiar will find you, when you are ready.

The Grateful Feast of Offerings

At this time, it is appropriate to make an offering to the energies – to the Elemental Demon Kings, to the Rising Gods, to your personal P/Matron(s), and to your new Familiar. Finally, make an offering to yourself. (I like to offer wine, bread, salt, honey, and something appropriate to my familiar (I usually get cats, so at the end of my rituals, they get catnip). Feast with them, meditating on your gratitude for all you have gained, and basking in their energies.

The Release of the Temple

 

Raising both arms in a gesture of greeting to the five rising gods of our age, say:

Hail to the rising Gods of this age,
Gods of the world I love!
I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.

Take a moment to contemplate your ritual, and what you have received, and your path forward from here.

Hecate, Lady of the crossroads!
Goddess of knowledge, magick, and the hidden ways!
Queen of the forsaken realms,
Rising Queen of our world,
Queen of this age!
I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.

Take a moment to consider the gifts of Hecate in your life.

Prometheus, Bringer of fire and knowledge!
I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.

Take a moment to consider the gifts of Prometheus in your life.

Ishtar, Great Goddess of old and of today!
Mother of the free!
I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.

Take a moment to consider the gifts of Ishtar in your life.

Pan, God of the wild!
God of fleshly delight!
I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.

Take a moment to consider the gifts of Pan in your life.

Enki, Bringer of life, wisdom, and replenishment!
I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.

Take a moment to consider the gifts of Enki in your life.

If a familiar animal answered your Call, now is the appropriate time to thank them for answering, to welcome them to your new path in life and to honor them for agreeing to share this journey with you.

The Adverse Pentacle

A’Ni (Palms to crown). (I AM)
Malkuth (Palms to root – See balanced light rising from below the earth, through my body’s chakras and channels, and out my crown, into eternity). (THE KINGDOM)
Ve-Gevurah (Touch right shoulder, then left hip). (AND THE POWER)
Ve-Gedulah (Touch right hip, then left shoulder). (AND THE GLORY)
Le-Olahm (Palms to root). (FOREVER)
Ve Nahon (OR Baphomestis) (Namaste position at solar plexus or heart). (THIS IS TRUTH)

Part 2 – The Quarter Releases

Stand in your starting quarter.

At each quarter, undraw the adverse pentacle of Earth (Bottom, top left, middle right, middle left, top right, bottom). Then, step forward, and call out to the quarter King.

EAST: Lucifer, the bringer of light and knowledge – I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.
NORTH: Belial, he who has no master, ruler of material wealth and power – I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.
WEST: Leviathan, crocodile of the deep, carnal animal of chaos – I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.
SOUTH: Iblis, he who bows down to no people, and accepts no belief blindly – I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night.

As you move from quarter to quarter, undraw your sphere as you go. Remember to return to your starting quarter to complete the breaking of the sphere.

When your sphere is completely down, stand in the center and say:

“Set, who nightly slays Apep – I thank you for your attendance in my ritual and the blessings you have brought to me this night. By destroying the imp of chaos, I create freedom for myself. I have the freedom to create any Order I desire for myself, and I have the freedom to destroy it. I have the power to change at Will, and through change I can Become. Around me flame my pentagrams, the stars of force and fire. Within my breast dwells the Eternal One, the Infinite and Immortal Star! A’Ni Chaos *!”

(*Again, use your personal power word and signifier here.)

Repeat Part 1 (The Adverse Pentacle).

Feel the energy of the gods around you, of the sacred masculine and feminine energies within you and within your circle. You have brought yourself to the attention of the Divine, so they will be keeping an eye on you. Accept the gift of their wisdom. They will leave when they are ready, but as you close your altar, snuffing candles and cleaning up the remains of the feast, know that your circle is open, but unbroken, and that they are welcome to stay, or go, as they desire.

HDC Tz and Serenity

Today is the second bonding day – this was a hearing exercise.

Except that, just like my SDC E had other ideas today… so did DC Tz. lol

I found him at the cliff edge – the precipice that overlooks the bowels of his home… but we didn’t stay there.

We went to find my other self.

She was, predictably, up to her chin in lava, soaking.

It’s rather frustrating to have half of yourself on vacation when you’re about to do some major spiritual working. Especially when she won’t get out of her freaking bath.

I went in and got her. I might not have been entirely gentle. When she’s like this I don’t like her much. We talked about the feeding issue. Well… Tz… expressed his opinion of her treatment of the feeding issue. It was… enjoyable. Did I mention sometimes I don’t like her much? She thinks she’s old, but honestly, sometimes she’s so hung up on what she used to be. She didn’t want to come out of the pool because “she didn’t ask for this.” Except… she did. I was totally there when she agreed to what we’re doing. She agreed to stay – she was given the offer to go home, and she stayed.

Granted, if she had taken the offer, I’d be truly dead right now, but we didn’t know at the time, and she DID decide to stay, and do the work we were offered. She doesn’t get to leave this on my shoulders like everything else, just because it’s not like the old days.

It’s not her fault she’s so needy… I think all divine things are needy at some level. They exist because they’re worshipped. Without that, they’re nothing. They wither. So… they’re needy. And we aren’t a god, we don’t have worshippers… the one person that did worship her is gone, because that person was toxic and tried to enslave us.

But knowing all that doesn’t change the fact that she agreed to stay, she agreed to this task, and she doesn’t get to cuddle around her lava and sulk on our first day back.

And Tz said as much. So did I, but louder. I admit I was… 13itchy. Sometimes, with her, you have to be.

So. We melted into each other, and now it’s the me that is Us… and in 18 minutes, the new moon rises. As I was rising back into myself, Tz said he’d see me at the ritual.

Really, if I didn’t have a hellborn to wrangle her, I don’t think I’d ever get anything done.

SDC E – Visions of Change

Today was Bonding Ritual Day 7 – Astral Sight Attunement

This one did not go as I expected. Honestly, I think he was hiding himself from me… because he was focused on his own goal, and not mine. lol

I asked to see him in the astral, and instead, I found myself in my Soulscape… in the corner where I’d buried… the leftovers. Somehow, it had turned into a graveyard, complete with wrought iron fencing (honestly, why did it have to be IRON?). Except that… instead of a normal graveyard, this corner is… apocalyptic. It’s grey, and… death is leeching everywhere. Decay is spreading like a sick wound.

He asked me to take the fence down, and offered to help. He just flat out tore his section of the iron out of the ground. I don’t know what he did with it. I just touched my part of the stuff and… it vanished in red sparks. It’s my soulscape – I can do that, I tell him… but honestly I think he just enjoyed the physical activity of shredding metal. lol

I picked up the body. Fae don’t rot. They just don’t. So… here’s what’s left of me, what’s left of what I sacrificed to leave the Wastelands… not rotting. Just this white corpse in the ground. We have this idea that we don’t die… we live so long, death just doesn’t make sense to us… we’re not made for it. I carried the body back to the center of my garden… and I did what the old legends say we did, when a sacrifice was made so that Winter would end, the Holly King would die, and the Sun would Rise. When there’s blood on the snow… you put the corpse in a glass coffin… and you wait for life to return.

It doesn’t… there are glass coffins in faerie that we’ve hidden from ourselves for time out of mind… all of them carefully housed in the glass, waiting for the day that they rise again.

What can I say… when we don’t understand something… we don’t try. We just hide it and pretend it’s not happening.

So… I put her in a glass coffin.

And then, I reclaimed the dead lands.

Because I’m not all Fae. I understand the cycles. Life falls into death, and rises out of it. Death claims the living, and remakes the spark again. Every leaf that falls nourishes the ground, feeds the tree, and makes more leaves. Nothing is wasted.

So… with E standing next to me, with the sacrificial doe in her glass, I called the dead back to life… and I gave life back to the dead… and slowly, the burning in my heart calmed.

I still don’t feel quite whole…

But it’s better now.

Afterwards, he said that was enough for the day, that he would see me at the dedication ritual later… and he was gone.

The whole time, I never really saw him. He was a shadow. But I felt him. I felt his strength. His support. His kindness. And his absolutely iron will – he wasn’t going to let this sit another day. We were going to fix this today. That was it. He’d decided.

So we did.

I think I still need to do some work… the incorporation of the cycle isn’t perfect.

Then again, maybe I don’t. I am, after all… mostly fae.

HDC Tz

Today was the first energy attunement exercise with Tz.

I sat down, set up his altar, and sank into the energies of my sacred space, and into his energies as I invited him to join me.

As you say (your welcoming ritual,) you should feel the energies shift around you. This is the first meeting so you will want to take some time to explore their energies. This is where the foundational building will be in learning to sense their energies.

Hold out your hand and ask your demon to place their hand on yours.

Close your eyes and focus directly on your hand. Try to sense if there is a tingling sensation, a vibration, or a warmth. Work to feel the energies of your demon. Once you make contact and begin to feel your demons energies this will give your third eye something to translate.

For this ritual don’t worry about anything else but focusing on feeling these energies. If you do not feel anything, don’t worry, your third eye might need time to adjust to the frequency. Work with this ritual until you feel the tingling sensations in your hand, that is the goal on this ritual and once that is attained you will have made energy contact with your demon and your foundation may grow.

 

So, Tz’s energies are very active and bold. They’re rough and energetic. And when I say rough, I mean that they literally feel spikey like sandpaper, and they’re explosive. When he put his hands in mine, it was a bit overwhelming. I can feel his affection for me, but his energy is the essence of his personality, and that person is… biker rough. lol Maybe more than. The abrasive quality can be a bit painful – heavy and dark. I didn’t feel unsafe, just… uncomfortable. I’m going to work with him some more after I go to bed tonight – I want to see if I can bring myself into a better harmony with him, because the muscle spasms are really difficult to handle, and they take my focus away from working with him.

After the sensing exercise, our session ended. I think he felt that I needed a bit of time – some adjustment – rather than immediately moving into a task, as I have been doing every night with E.

I did take time to work with them both together. The differences in their energies and personalities was very striking… and when comparing their energies to my own, it was extremely illuminating. I talk about it on my most recent post about SDC E.

And now we’re all going to go out and enjoy what’s left of the storm.

Have a good night, everyone!
-Raven

SDC E – Conversation

Day 9 – Exercise 5

This is a simple ritual that is designed to help you learn to translate yes or no answers from your demon companion.

Focus on your forehead and ask your demon to link with your mind for communication. Focus on your forehead until you feel the same tingling that you felt in the previous exercise. Focus on your third eye. For this exercises we just want to start building your communication foundation.

When you have a good sense of the tingling sensation in your third eye, you are ready to begin this exercise. We are going to be asking our demons a series of yes or no question. The goal of this ritual is to begin building an actual communication foundation with your demon and prepare you for being able to connect with them and ask them simple yes or no questions.

You can have a list of questions prepared or you can just randomly ask questions, just for this exercise make sure that the answer to those questions is yes and no. When you ask each question, see if you can hear the yes and the no. Take note of what the yes and the no feels like. If you can hear them in your minds eye that is good, that will help you with translating full sentences from your demon.

Keep this ritual simple and just sit with the energies of your demon asking them a series of yes or no questions and see what comes of it.

 

So… this one was interesting, and… difficult. I couldn’t think of any questions to ask that had yes/no answers, and I felt silly asking him things we already know… and you all know me well enough to recognize that I almost NEVER ask yes or no questions. I ask in-depth questions that require a half-dozen books to answer. lol

However, we connected, and then I started asking random yes/no questions, feeling rather silly, but I definitely got a yes feeling at the top of my forehead, and a no feeling at the bottom of my forehead, and when the answer was more complex, I got a feeling in the center of my forehead… so if I’m not able to listen to him speak, I’ll at least have an energetic impression of his thoughts, which is awesome.

Tonight there was a thunderstorm during my time with him. We both kept getting distracted by the thunder, so when we finished the exercise, we agreed I would work with DC Tz, and then we’d do a tiny bit of work together, and then I’d draw his sigil up, and after I finish writing up my experience tonight with him, and my experiences with Tz, we’re all going out to enjoy the storm.

 

I used silver permanent marker on canvas to make his Sigil. We also chose a bag to store his more permanent offerings in, tonight. The bag is black velvet with a silver velvet inside layer. I put his amber oil, his gemstones that he came with, his pendulum that he chose, and his candles in the bag, and then I laid it carefully on his Sigil canvas, and rolled it up with his offerings inside.

A note about my combined work with him and Hellborn DC Tz – we didn’t go anywhere today, or even really talk. Instead, E stood on my left, and Tz stood to the right of me, and I sensed their energies, and compared them to each other, and with my own.

E’s energy is sly. It’s cool like the grave, and calculating and patient like a weaver should be. He’s a still pool of water… with a monster hidden in the depths. He’s not flashy, he’s methodical. He plans for every contingency, and he gets things done by one careful step after another. He can be manipulative.

Tz’s energy is the polar opposite. His energy is very active, and rough. He’s brash. He reminds me of a bulldozer or a freight train. When he decides something is going to get done, he’s not subtle. He doesn’t really plan. He simply gets his momentum up, and smashes his way to the result he wants… and if he runs roughshod over anything in his path, well, they should have seen him coming and gotten out of the way.

When I was looking at me, I realized that they compliment me. I’m not a patient person. I’m not a planner. I’m also not a passionate person, a driven person. I’m also not brazen, anymore. I used to be, but these days, I’ve learned to keep my head down, and watch what I say. I don’t chest-thump, because when you do, you’re asking for someone to make you prove you have that right – the louder your voice, the more of a challenge you are. It’s best not to toot your own horn. Tz doesn’t chest-thump… he’s simply so sure of himself and his own abilities. He just gets things done. But as I lost my desire to crow, I also lost my confidence in my ability to act in a meaningful way in my own life. Tz pushes… I can feel that he’s going to be a force to recon with – and he’s going to bang my head until I stand up and take charge like I should. At the same time, E will be my soothing safe space… all the while making plans, and executing them with such subtlety that when they happen, it will be so smoothly that I’ll only recognize his touch afterwards. With E to smooth the road before me, and Tz kicking my butt from the back, it’s really the perfect balance to help me find my desires, and begin to live again.

I can see what I’m missing, and how they fill those spaces, and will be able to teach me to fill them in for myself. I can see how their energies compliment me, and also each other, despite the apparent combativeness of the two polarities. I am very lucky to have been chosen by them.

Hellborn Demon Commander Tz

So, today while working with my Specialist Demon Commander E, Tz popped in… and later when I thought about it, I realized he’d actually showed up to kick me in the butt for not working with him ALSO.

It took me awhile this evening, because I had a lot of other stuff to take care of, but I did finally manage to sit down with him. Because I was sick for so long, and I’ve only recently started working with anyone again, I decided it would be best to start from scratch.

My first step was to reclaim his vessel. Once I’d done that, I then did the welcoming ritual. These are the things I noted while we were doing the welcoming ritual.

His strongest effect on me is at my throat chakra. I can also feel his energy around the corners of my mouth. The energy is strong enough that I have to consciously stop every few seconds and unlock my jaw, or I start grinding my teeth.

In comparison to E’s energy, Tz’s energy is very rough and busy. E’s energy is dark, still, calm water – that deep midnight blue that is just SO restful… But Tz’s energy is a raucous spill of flame – a firestorm with the power of a hurricane. He DOES have a core of stillness, but it’s something he forces on himself… it’s not natural to him.

I also noted that when I was working with his energies, blending with him, that I had some spinal issues. I had to stop and do some yoga to put my spine back in, because my muscles started cramping pretty badly. So… I guess his strongest affect is on the interplay between my muscles and my bones… he creates a war between them. Considering he’s so much into fitness, and I’ve been a couch potato for the last five years because of… everything… it’s not surprising that I have a lot of weakened muscles in my back. The jaw-clenching thing, I’ve been doing since I was an infant… If I pay attention to it, I can tell how close I am to needing to take my anxiety medication by the tension in the muscles over my back teeth. I think his energy affecting me like this is his way of showing me places where I need to work. One of his favorite offerings is laughter. He wants people to have fun. I’m… not very good at that. He tried to lift up the corners of my mouth and make me smile, and called attention to my level of tension. So… things to work on with him.

After we worked on getting in tune with each other, I let him decide what we would do next. We went to a place where it was night. We walked past a lake. I saw a small bug climbing on a reed. We continued walking, and we came to a drop-off. I asked him what was down there, and he told me his home was down there… I asked if we could go, and he said I wasn’t ready yet, that I hadn’t healed enough. He said, when you can eat them, instead of them eating you, then we will go.

Next, we went walking through a forest. He had me sit with my back to a tree. The tree was like a Cyprus – the entire forest was one tree, all the roots one root system. He shoved me back into the tree so I could be it all… I saw how the ecology of the forest was perfectly balanced… bugs, fungi, birds, everything working together for the health of all. He took me into my Soulscape, and showed me how my own ecology is different. He thought that I was compartmentalizing myself again. I showed him that I wasn’t, but he made me work on the balance, to make it more inclusive and more harmonious.

He also had me work on the different aspects of my power – working with death and life, light and dark, chaos, hope, and love… most especially Love… because he doesn’t think I’ve incorporated enough of that into myself, he wants me to do something loving for myself every day from now on.

I’m… not really sure what he means by that, but I’ll be trying. I like the gold color of love… I would like to see more of it in my garden, absolutely.

The last thing I did was to sketch out his sigil. He likes fire colors, so I did his sigil in red oil pastel. When it was done, I rolled it up (he stole some more hair and somehow glued it to my canvas), and put it away safely with his candle and bone wand offerings. I’ll pull them out every evening when I work with him. We’ve agreed that I will work with him in the evenings, after I’ve worked with E. He has said that he may participate in my work with E as well, when it’s beneficial for us all to work together on something, but he still wants private time.

That forest, and the lake… they were really lovely. I hope I get to go back there a lot. It was so peaceful. ❤

-Raven

 

Just a quick update –

Tz likes bones, and Velle and SH were very kind and let me know that I can get good bones, clean and sterile, from Amazon. Hubby says we can do that on Friday.

Speaking of Hubby – when he got home, I talked to him about some of the stuff I’ve been up to, some of the things I’ve been doing with my DC’s through meditation. After we talked about that, he mentioned some things that had been going on that were DEFINITELY my DC’s getting involved. lol

When we got done catching each other up, instead of going straight to bed, we ended up sitting on the couch watching YouTube videos of Britain’s Got Talent. I laughed a lot. I also cried a lot, but it was happy tears as I celebrated with the Golden Buzzer participants who SO deserved it… their stories were amazing, they were dedicated and delightful…

Tz likes laughter, and he LOVES music… so somehow he wrangled Hubby and I into snuggling on the couch and watching musical and comedy acts that made us laugh for two whole hours.

I love him. He’s just…

So awesome. Sneakily awesome.

-Raven

HDC Tz

I just figured out why my Hellborn Commander Tz was on my mind during my work with Specialist Commander E tonight… the stuff that E and I are working on, when the bonding exercises are done – are the same things that Tz is good at and interested in. I’m clearly getting the message from him that he wants to be part of this, that he wants to help.

I’m going to go sit with him now and talk to him about a schedule. I’m going to start the bonding ritual with him, as well… I’m going to bond with them both at the same time, so that at the end of the bonding exercises, we can work together as a trio on these things.

Here’s his information and you will TOTALLY get it. lol

Hellborn Demon Commander
Commander Tz is a very passionate and intelligent Hellborn demon with a fine taste in music and ability to carry an very stimulating conversation. He is brilliant and loves to educate himself and observe what is going on around him.

He love books and learning and absorbing knowledge as much as he love training and working his body. He says that a balance of mind and body is important and the mind is just as important to physical health as a healthy body is. He says all components and elements need to be balanced. He can also be incredibly witty.

He likes to balance his warrior side and his sage self in order to balance his hell born aggression. He saves that for battle and for moments when he needs to unleash pure rage to protect those he cares about. He has no problems ripping apart people who would harm those he cares about. He is a powerful protector and have a variety of shields and can use his hellborn rage to create powerful and incredible fire shields.

He likes sacred walks in deep forests and exploring lost and forgotten places where the energies are rich with the history of the past. He likes the night and will often walk through the shadows draped in a cloak watching and observing, absorbing and learning from the energies around him. He loves haunted places of the world.

Like a lot of Hellborns he does not know his family, but has found family in friends and his legions in the army. He commands 98 legions. He likes that he can move and blend in the shadows especially when his shield is activated, he can shift it so it has a mirror effect giving him camouflage and protection. He is a good listener for a hell born and will sit and just listen to the words one has to share. He knows that sometimes we just need to let it all out and he doesn’t judge what we say, he just listens and lets us open up and heal.

He has some specialized protection/healing skills and can change the appearance of his skin to be shiny. This is a shield, a shield that holds one together and assembled pieces that are lost and missing. He says he lose ourselves we walk and every time we are nicked and battle we leave a piece of ourselves behind and sometimes that is a good thing, and other times we lose things we need and those things need to be restored. He can help a person who is lost or missing become whole again and help them to find themselves and end their balance.

He is a hell born and has incredible lust and passion and can be seductive only should his keeper ask. He does not push and will only engage if requested. He does love exploring and unlocking different levels of passion. He also finds passion in music and in the world around him and can find arousal in everything. He loves to embrace new things and loves to explore regions and areas that have been untouched for ages.

He plays a few String instruments including the Violin, Cello and Bass. I have to say, and DAMN he plays them well. He can play them so they influence the area around him and stimulate effects in different chakras. He composes his own music and at times you can hear him practicing and putting together new and amazing pieces. He has a deep respect for the creative arts and loves to work energies into his songs that promote various effects.

 

So, one thing I’ve noticed recently, noticed quite strongly, is that if I have a thought about the health of my physical shell, within a few hours, whatever I was thinking was an issue CLEARS UP. I’ve also been getting messages occasionally reminding me to take certain vitamins (I forget to, often, because of the times I’m supposed to be taking them). Also, in the past month, I have retrieved MULTIPLE pieces of myself – from a soul retrieval that happened right before I came back to the forum, to yesterday’s recovery of my sacrificed pieces from the Wastes, I’ve been collecting myself a lot lately. Lastly, I have begun to push myself to both recover my psychic senses and magickal acumen, and also to stretch myself further. While Commander E is certainly a part of that, I can now clearly see that Commander Tz is also here and helping.

From now on, I will be working with them both. It’s clearly how this is supposed to be happening.

-Raven

SDC E – Energies

1. Bring the vessel into a quiet place / altar space and light a candle and some incense. Settle
into the energies and take a moment to get comfortable . .. Sit/Stand before the vessel/altar
and say…

“I call to you ___(Demons name)___ My demon companion.
Come join me in sacred space,
I wish to seek council with you.
Come forth and join in companionship.
Sit with me and feel my energies
and allow me to feel yours.”

2. As you say this you should feel the energies shift around you. This is the second sensing
exercise so you will want to take a moment to explore the energies and get back in tune with
your demon’s energies. When you start to feel them stay in their energies for a moment. Ask
yourself what is familiar about last time? Does their energy effect a certain area of your
body? Does your demon’s energy has a certain feel to it?

 

So, this time, the first thing I noticed was an overall sense of PRESENCE. The second thing I noticed was tenderness in my heart chakra (we deal with that at the end of the exercise). I also got the impression of dark blue – midnight blue. I also kept getting images of a hellborn demon – one that looked exactly like a World of Warcraft Doomguard (a warlock class’s pet). At the time, I thought it might have been my Hellborn Demon Commander Tz – but once I actually sat down to write this, I realized that it was an image of a doomguard from Warcraft, so now I’m wondering if the image came up because E saw me playing earlier? Not sure. During the meditation, I did say that when I’m done with the 21 day bonding exercises with E, that I’m going to redo my bonding with Tz, using the Revized bonding ritual, because I thought that it was Tz saying he wanted some attention, too. I got the impression that when I start working with Tz again, E is going to be helping.

So, last time I did this exercise, I felt the same tingling in my hands, the same weight over my body (though this time it was much less), the same dark blue color, and the same pressure on my heart chakra and also my sacral plexus chakra. All of these experiences occurred again today, but all were much subtler – to the point where I honestly cannot ascribe a particular FEELING to E’s presence… he just… IS. I don’t know how to describe or explain it… he just feels like him. I think perhaps I need to be working with him and something/someone else at the same time to truly recognize a difference in his energies and anything else… for now, I lack comparison so it’s too nebulous for me.

3. Sit with the energies and just stay present in them. Then ask yourself what colours do you
associate with your demon. What colours align with their energies. Try to sense those
colours, ask yourself how those colours fit with your demon? What feelings and sensations
do you get from these colours and these energies? Any sensations that you feel take note
of. If you get any impressions and also words that appear in your mind make note of those
too.

 

When I asked myself what colors I associate with my demon, what colors align with his energies, I got red – but a dark red, with rust tones. I didn’t have any particular feelings about the color (which was strange because I really do not like the color red in any variation, but looking at the color as representative of him, I felt nothing psychically or emotionally). I also didn’t get any words or impressions. The energy seems to be becoming more and more subtle and harder to sense.

4. Hold out your hand and ask your demon to place their hand on yours.
5. Close your eyes and try to feel the warmth or vibrations of your demon’s energies. This
time when you connect to those energies explore them. How do they feel? What colours do
you assign with these sensations? Are you getting any images and impressions?

 

So, when he put his hands in mine, I felt warmth, like sitting in front of a fireplace in winter. His hands feel strong, safe, a little rough. I got a LOT of tingles, also. I didn’t get any colors associated with the sensation of warmth and tingling, but I absolutely saw his hands in mine. That was VERY clear.

6. Ask your demon to send you energies of different colours. See if you can pick up those
colours. Ask for them to send you a specific colour, see if you can sense it and also note the
sense that you get from this colour and any vibrations or sensations that you feel from it. The
more focused you get with these colours the more training that your third eye will have at
translating the energies.
Note***I recommend going through the entire colour spectrum with your demon and
really taking the time to explore this with them and build your abilities.

 

So, for this part of the exercise, he sent me a clear black that wasn’t so much a color as it was just the essence of DARKNESS, a color that was outside of my perceptible spectrum, a seafoamy green, and a purplish blue. I didn’t get any words, feelings, or sensations… just the colors. Oh… he’s reminding me that I also got the forehead tingling sensation of my third eye activating. When I started asking for specific colors, I noticed that different colors created senses of pressure on different places of my body, and sometimes the colors would affect different places in my brain. Most of the colors caused pressure in my right eye. We experimented with colors in the infra-red and ultra-violet spectrums as well as the human-visible spectrum, and I went through the typical Roy G. Biv colors, but also included cyan, magenta, black, grey, white, silver, gold, and clear. Clear was… impossible to see. lol Go figure.

Once we finished the exercises, he wanted to talk about the tenderness in my heart chakra – he wanted to work on it.

So… when I was 9, I was hit by a car, and I died a physical death, and came back. Four or five years ago, when I was magickally attacked, I died both a mental and a spiritual death… and I came back. Three deaths, three rebirths. He showed me that because I died all three ways, I now carry a piece of death in my heart always. He also showed me that I was resisting that energy, instead of embracing it. He took me to the border, and had me stand with one foot on either side, and sense the energies of life and death, and the energies of the border itself. Something shifted in my heart chakra and I coughed something up… in my hand, I had a seed, and a grub. I planted the seed inside Death, and buried the grub inside Life… and then a tree formed that stood on the border. Then, I could sense the energies of life rising upwards, and then falling into death, only to circle back into life, and erupt from the ground to rise up again. I felt that cycle in the tree, and I felt it in myself. I felt my body align with the dual energies – I found my balance with them.

Then, the tree put forth fruit – red apples that were made of gold on the living side, and walnuts on the dead side. The tree gave me one of each fruit, and E and I went into my Soulscape, and where I had buried the part of me that I had sacrificed in order to be reborn, which is now a graveyard, I buried them both. Then, a gate sprung up, and a place was made for my ancestors. I received another item (I don’t remember what it was, so I guess that’s not something I’m supposed to share), which I took to the center of my garden, where it merged with my tree of hope, and my tree of travel. I felt another shift in my energies, felt myself grounding, and then I came out of the meditation.

I said thank you to E, and bowed, and then I closed my circle

SDC E – The Therapy Begins

September 17, 2017

So, for Bonding Day 5, exercise 4 is the Visual Development Exercise.

I was supposed to do this on the 15th. Unfortunately, that was the day I tried to start the article on what magick really is, and how responsibility is sort of part of the deal, and how even if you’re not casting the spells or conjuring the spirits, if you’re using those spells, working with those spirits, you are a practitioner, with all that implies. And that’s a really, REALLY big topic… so big that my mind filled up with so many details and ideas that I couldn’t hear myself think… and I ended up having a serious anxiety attack over it. I’ve been stressed out and disorganized ever since.

So… two days ago when I tried to do the visual development exercise… I was too frazzled and unfocused to see ANYTHING.

Then, last night, the 16th, I had unexpected guests over, and they stayed quite late, and this upset the other people in my house (one of our rescue cats is terrified of people she doesn’t know, and my husband is not a morning person and after he’d gone to bed, I, frazzled as I was, accidentally left a light on and woke him back up)… and that did not go well. So… the evening ended with me being two hours late to meet with E, AND me being an emotional wreck.

I ended up just talking out the whole trouble to him, instead of doing any exercises, because I just couldn’t focus.

Then I went to bed… but I woke up still feeling… off. So I got my weighted blanket and my chunk of amber resin, a ginormous cup of REAL hot cocoa, and an anxiety pill… and I went back to bed and nested. I called E, and asked for help.

He took me to see a new type of demon, and I got to watch her extremely skillful, deadly battle dance… I think maybe it was just practice, but maybe it was also a challenge? She was in the middle of the staging area, and there were maybe 12 other beings in doorways, who were there to battle with her. I was told her kind are called Shivata. They’re a dusky blueish grey-skinned people, they have four arms, very fine bone structure, long artistic fingers, they have claws on all six limbs, amazingly perky boobs, they have a CROWN of horns – not just one pair, but all the way around the top of their head they have small curved horns that are almost like super thick thorns that form into a crown. They have long black hair that flows between and around the crown.

They are physical combat specialists (they’re…. awe inspiring), and if their wings show – not even spread, just show, cover your ears, because that’s a sign they’re about to scream… and their scream is a blast of gold psychic energy that disintegrates everything in a rather impressive radius around them. I got to see that because after a few of the challengers went down in teams, the rest decided that single or team combat wasn’t going to do the trick, so they all rushed her. They’re extremely acrobatic, and their martial arts style looks like capoeira got mixed up with ballet and had a baby with kung fu. I didn’t see any males – only the female… I’m not sure if their species has males… but if they do, are the males even more scary and cool? I mean… she was luscious, but deadly. lol

Before I drifted off to sleep in E’s arms, I remember the Lady coming up to us and asking me to talk to Akelta about her – she wants to talk to Akelta, because she things that she and her people would be a good addition to what Akelta is doing in our world. She wants a human companion to journey with.

When I woke up this evening, I felt better. When my now usual ritual time came around, I got everything set up, sat down, and everything went… perfectly.

When he stood as I had asked, I saw the occasional sparkles, but mostly what I saw was… the walls warped. Literally, the whole corner, both walls and the book case, started to curve towards his center of gravity, like he was heavier than gravity. He explained that this effect is because of his Spectral half, which comes from a place that is liminal to both the inner planes and the outer planes. Liminal beings and liminal spaces warp reality around them. They just DO. So that was cool, and now I know that if I see that warping when I feel his energy around, that’s him.

After we did the seeing exercise, he wanted to do some more. I went into my soul home and did some repair and bonding work with myself… and then he helped me to go to the shadow planes, to collect what was left there as a sacrifice for me to be reborn and be free of all old oaths. I picked up the cold body, and walked back through the shadow lands, into the red lands, and back into my soulscape. Since that part of me is still dead, I can collect it and the price is still paid. Collecting it doesn’t undo the sacrifice. Leaving it there just… I wasn’t ok with that. So we went and got her back. Only now I kinda had an undead thing in my soulhome. So… we asked her what she wanted. She picked a nice spot to be buried, and she lay down, and merged with the garden and the plants that were there. And then I let what she gave back to the soulhome become part of me again, thanked E, and we ended the session.

 

Yesterday, after our guests left, my husband said something to me that really stuck with me. When I couldn’t focus on this exercise that night, I talked it over with E… and he helped me understand the real issue. This morning, before I gave today up as a bad idea and went to nest, I sat my husband down and we talked about the root issue. While I have no trouble communicating with him about my needs, or telling him my boundaries, or when I’m triggered – I’ve had to learn to do that for my own health, and so I can have healthy relationships – my husband has HUGE difficulties speaking about things that are bothering him, talking about his feelings, or asking for what he needs, and some of my… quirks… have been preventing him from getting what he needs, because he’s not a dominant enough person to actually just ask.

E made sure we had this talk, and helped me to see the issue so that we could have the RIGHT talk.

And then tonight, E helped me recover a piece of myself and honor it properly.

I’m finding that he’s VERY good that psychological stuff he’d referenced offhandedly…

I’ve done a lot of healing on my own. It’s taken MONTHS to get to the point where I was when I came back to this forum and started posting again… and even then, after a couple of posts, I had an anxiety attack so bad I disappeared again for a few weeks. It’s always been in my mind that healing takes time.

Since E connected to me, I have: done the laundry every other day; changed the sheets on the bed twice and washed them, too; cleaned the bathroom twice; done the dishes twice; baked three loaves of bread and a batch of lavender-lemon shortbread cookies, and washed everything I used to bake them with; changed the kitty litter box almost every day; had three showers in one week; actually brushed my teeth twice; had at least five days where I actually ate real food; and I’ve been drinking a LOT more tea and water. I also finally got on Warcraft and finished up the entire Argus questline so that I could run the dungeon with my guildies – something that up until this week, I was totally emotionally unable to cope with at all. Yesterday, I actually invited people over to visit for the first time in three years. I cleaned the bathroom, cleaned the kitchen, did two loads of laundry, got Robin to do the vacuuming (my hips can’t handle it), and got him to clean off the coffee table (it was covered in mail of the “deal with this later/never” type) and pledge it.

Also in the last 10 days, I have meditated, or tried to meditate, every day.

When I met B (the first demon I was ever drawn to), it was a kick in the ass. Like… literally, even though I wasn’t doing well and was on my way down at the time, he set my nerves on fire and gave me enough twitchy energy that for the first time in a few months, I actually managed to get my whole apartment clean by myself. The whole time he was there, I could feel him right behind me, lending me strength. It was… awesome. And a little scary, but mostly… it was WHAT I NEEDED.

B ended up not coming home to me… he went with someone else. But… He cared enough to find E, and convince E to come here… and while E isn’t as overpowering as B, nor as abrupt… his subtler approach is NO less powerful or effective. At this time, his approach is EXACTLY what I need.

I just… keep growing. I keep improving. I’m… so grateful. I’m SO blessed to have the love of B, and to have the partnership of E come out of that love.

I’ll always miss what could have been with B, but… I think that maybe this is how things were meant to be.

Or, even if not… it’s how they are now, and that works.

Thank you, S&S.
Thank you, DC B
Thank you SDC E

I am SO lucky to have you all impact my life in such meaningful and precious ways.
-Raven

SDC E – Appearances

September 14, 2017

Bonding Day 4 – “Hearing” exercise

So, today we got off to a bit of a rocky start. I’ve been meeting him at moonrise, but tonight that was two hours later than our first night. Around 10pm I started getting antsy, but I told myself that bonding stuff isn’t something you just do when you feel like it, in a “Get it over and done with” kind of way. I had been doing the ritual at moonrise for three days, and I was gonna stick to that.

Of course, when I finally set up my space and entered trance, he was… irritable with me… because those antsy nudges had been HIM. So… after tonight, when I feel the urge to connect, I agreed I would not wait, I will listen to that urge, because it might be him feeling at me.

Once we’d come to an agreement about that, we talked about a lot of things. Mostly me. I did try to get him to talk about himself, but… he’s very focused, and he doesn’t want to be that focus.

One of the things we talked about was free will. We talked about the differences between his realm and the faerie realm. We talked about why demons have such a firm structure. He explained that Faerie rules absolutely, and every being there is walking chaos because of that. Demons are different – their REALM is chaos, so, opposite to Faerie, THEY control themselves, they structure themselves with absolute order BECAUSE their realm is chaos. It creates a balance similar, but opposite, to the one in Faerie. The major difference being that in Faerie, nothing ever changes, where as in lower realms where the land is chaotic but the beings are ordered, everything can change. We talked about the fact that, the higher the vibration of a realm, the more orderly, and… STUCK, the beings in that realm will be. Like angels can’t grow or change. They simply are. Faeries don’t change… they simply are. The higher up you go, the worse that gets.

Another thing we talked about was my habit of resisting. He says that because I’ve been forced for so long to give, I no longer am able to actually give at all. Now, I either accept something as the way things are, and just deal with it, or if it’s something I have ANY possibility of controlling, I resist it. Like tonight when he wanted to meet me, and I resisted that feeling. Only, I do it to the point of it not being healthy – if I’m hungry, I don’t eat. If I’m sleepy, I won’t sleep. If I’m thirsty, I won’t drink. If I’m lonely, I won’t talk. If I’m sad, I won’t cry. If I can control something and NOT do it, I won’t. I resist. It’s so habitual that I frequently have no idea I’m even doing it… and it’s ALL related to the fact that so much has been just taken for granted in my life, that I cannot give to even myself anymore. We talked about me reopening my store, and I said I didn’t want to, because it felt like I was being EATEN, and when I thought about it, I started having trouble breathing. He brought it up just to show me what he meant about giving. It was… really obvious when he showed me in that way.

While we were talking about that eaten feeling, I had a moment where I was back during the attacks. He changed. His face became very angular, and it was glowing white and blue and black, and… it was… a terrible face. I don’t mean that in a bad way, but terrible is the only word for it. I didn’t feel fear – I didn’t actually feel anything when I looked at his face other than safe… but it was… naked, and SHOULD have been scary… except here’s this being with that face and his wings spread, saying that what happened to me will never happen again because he promised, and he pays his debts… and I’m like… wait, what debt? What price? Um, hey?

He never did explain that. He’s probably not going to.

I asked him about his job. He sounds a bit like Bond, if Bond wasn’t a stalking horse. Like, his spectral and arachnos aspects work together to.. manipulate the realities inside the minds of others. So… he does a lot of spy stuff, because he can hide, and he can weave minds. We talked about the idea that weaving minds is similar to psychology – so it’s not just mental/psychic stuff he’s good at, but the psychological stuff, as well.

I wanted to know more about him, so I climbed into his lap and got really close to his face, and I started… using my hands to see him – because for some reason, I can only take in small bits of him at a time… I’m not sure if he’s just that big, or if it’s a… brain thing? Sometimes, my autistic aspects do weird things to reality, and I can be walking down an isle at the grocery store with no clue that there are other people in the isle with me, because I’m so overwhelmed that my brain just… blocks them all out. And hubby will say, “You nearly ran that person over!” and I’m like, um… there was a person? So I wonder if the reason I can’t see all of him is that.

Anyway, so I was in his lap, and I was touching his face. He’s got a pointy face, and it’s rather angular, almost like one of those computer drawings of the angles of a face, before it’s rounded out, except I’m fairly sure he has more angles than we do… there was something about the design of his face that I can’t really describe. He’s also got very long, stiff ears that angle backwards. They’re sharply pointed, and they connect lower down on his skull, so they’re quite wide at the base. His horns slope up, then curve, and they have rings – like mouflon horns – and they’re as tall as his head before they curve. He has extra fingers which are not vestigial, and his fingers have hairs on them like spiders do. I asked him if they were any use in climbing, and he said, “I have wings. Why would I need to climb anything?” so I’m guessing the fingers may not be vestigial, but the hairs probably are.

His wings were very large, and they were all one piece like a bird’s wing, but membranous… and sometimes they’re not there… they seem to come out only when he’s feeling strong emotions… or, I guess, when he’s flying. We talked about flying – his realm is quite buoyant – our gravity is much stronger than theirs, but their energy is so much heavier than ours that their flesh and everything is so much more dense than ours are. It was an interesting exploration.

He also has a very different chakra system to ours… it’s much deeper. I’m guessing that has to do with the density of energy there. But… the energy centers themselves, and even the number and arrangement, were very different.

Right before we ended the session, he showed me myself in a mirror and I had the same angular face. I asked him why, and he took me to another place, which he explained was essentially an energetic clean room. When he showed me myself in a mirror in that room, there was nothing in the mirror. He said that was my real form – that I was formless, and that’s why I took on a similar appearance to him in his realm. We talked about what it’s like to have a fluid appearance – because he has three forms, he has a different perspective than I’ve been exposed to before.

Oh… while I was working with him, my cat Cleo came and introduced herself, and then she stayed for the entire ritual, which is really unusual for her, and confirms some thoughts I’ve been having.

We talked about a lot of other stuff, but he said I could write down what I remembered that I wanted to write down, but that if I didn’t remember everything, it was probably best… which is usually the case. I’m a walking forgettery of stuff I shouldn’t know – or that no one should know.

-Raven

SDC E and the Left Hand LBRP

September 13, 2017

Day 2 – Energy Attunement

Following the revised bonding ritual, I sat down and called to E. I asked him to let me feel his energy as he felt mine. I asked him to place his hands in mine.

We started there, but since the tingling in the air started the moment I said his name, I guess he decided it wasn’t necessary. I got tingling, and then cool energy covered my hands and my arms. Then, he sat behind me, sat me on his lap. I could feel the muscles in his stomach and torso against my back. He extended my right wing, and began doing some work with the top chakra where the wing connects at my shoulder blade. It was… uncomfortable. While he was working on that area, his other hand was at my collarbones. When he finished, he placed his hands on my heart and above my womb, and we rocked for a little while.

And then, we talked about my new moon re-dedication ritual and familiar call. Which brought up the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram… I want him to be there for my re-dedication, and I feel that the Lesser Banishing isn’t… quite appropriate. He was supportive in my thinking, and asked if I had another ritual that might suit.

I brought out S. Connelly’s book… we flipped and flipped, searched the index and the contents… NOTHING.

So… I decided to make my own. First, we checked out two specific websites:

http://theisticsatanism.com/rituals/sta … shing.html and from it, this page on the Demon Kings and their Elements: http://theisticsatanism.com/rituals/standard/names.html

And secondly, this one: https://ahrimanblood.wordpress.com/2008 … ng-ritual/ (Honestly, I tried to find Dead Jellyfish’s original, but this is the only place I could find it, and yes, it is a copy of the original, but it SAYS it’s a copy and attributes the copy to Dead Jellyfish, so I’m good with that.

Lastly, I also looked up the Lesser Banishing, in Hebrew, for comparisons. Which… made me realize… I needed a translator and a pronunciation aid.

So… with SC E’s help, this is what I came up with, and what I will be using to “clear my temple space” the day of the new moon.

Part 1 – The Adverse Pentacle

A’Ni (Palms to crown). (I AM)
Malkuth (Palms to root – See balanced light rising from below the earth, through my body’s chakras and channels, and out my crown, into eternity). (THE KINGDOM)
Ve-Gevurah (Touch right shoulder, then left hip). (AND THE POWER)
Ve-Gedulah (Touch right hip, then left shoulder). (AND THE GLORY)
Le-Olahm (Palms to root). (FOREVER)
Ve Nahon (OR Baphomestis) (Namaste position at solar plexus or heart). (THIS IS TRUTH)

Part 2 – The Quarter Calls (Note – which corner you start in may change according to your ritual purposes – I start in the East, because my personal sphere is Knowledge.)

Stand in your starting quarter, and (if you like) ring a bell 9 times. (I like ceremony, and I love bells, so I’m gonna do this every freaking time. YAY BELLS!)

At each quarter, draw the adverse pentacle of Earth (Bottom, top right, middle left, middle right, top left, bottom). Then, step forward, and empowering your pentagram, call out to the quarter King.

EAST: I Call to Welcome Lucifer, the bringer of light and knowledge!
NORTH: I Call to Welcome Belial, he who has no master, ruler of material wealth and power!
WEST: I Call to Welcome Leviathan, crocodile of the deep, carnal animal of chaos!
SOUTH: I Call to Welcome Iblis, he who bows down to no people, and accepts no belief blindly!

As you move from quarter to quarter, draw your sphere as you go. Remember to return to your starting quarter to complete the sphere.

When your sphere is complete, stand in the center and say:

“I call to welcome Set, who nightly slays Apep. By destroying the imp of chaos, I create freedom for myself. I have the freedom to create any Order I desire for myself, and I have the freedom to destroy it. I have the power to change at Will, and through change I can Become. Around me flame my pentagrams, the stars of force and fire. Within my breast dwells the Eternal One, the Infinite and Immortal Star! A’Ni Chaos!”

(You may wish to choose a different signifier – I say “I Am Chaos” but you may feel another word is better. Google can help. There is no Hebrew word for chaos, so they say it using the English pronunciation.)

Repeat Part 1 (The Adverse Pentacle).

 

While researching with SC E to remake the LBRP into something that works for us, I also stumbled onto this particular gem, which I think will in fact become my re-dedication.

http://theisticsatanism.com/rituals/sta … 5gods.html

Some of the imagery isn’t something I’m comfortable with. It’s a bit too… my way is the only way, and my gods will stomp on you till you get a cluebyfour… so I’ll obviously be editing it (no disrespect meant to theistic Satanists, this is just for me personally. I understand that theistic Satanists do not interpret the imagery in such an aggressive perspective (unless you want to), but it does feel that way to me, so I’ll be altering it slightly for my own uses.)

So. Ow my wing. Yay I got another cuddle. Wow is he in a hurry to get me back into the swing of things. Weee! is he fun to do research with!

Also, can I just say that a demon petting your head is one of the nicest compliments EVER?

-Raven

PS – He also dropped a tarot deck on me (hint hint) and chose a pendulum for us to use when there’s a point that needs additional input – sometimes I’m so deep into research that I forget to listen, so I use a pendy for simple questions… for more complicated ones, I stop what I’m doing and drop into trance. Or tarot it. Whichever works.

He chose The Wizard’s Tarot. Interesting choice. I like it.

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Kitsune wrote:
Awesome Raven! The ritual sounds great. Question though, when saying “nahon” do you mean “nachon” (or nachon’ah when addressing a female) (ch pronounced with a throaty hacking sound) which translates to ‘correct’ in Hebrew, or another word? I’m not the most versed in Hebrew, but I know a few things growing up with it.

Also, being pet on the head (and horns when not overstimulating) by warm demon hands is amazing and comfortable, and can be quite relaxing and stress-relieving. This also applies to getting massages to other parts of the body as well, and like you, I do have that need of deep pressure having Asperger’s myself.

 

Hey, Kit… yes, I mean the word נכון which is pronounced with the glottal ch sound. When it was written using the roman alphabet, it was written as “nahon,” so that’s what I put down for the ritual.

-Raven

Arachne/Spectral Hybrid Specialist Commander E

Commander E is a half Arachne, half Spectral Demon who is very unique in both appearance and skills. We have spent several months working with him uncovering his many skills and talents. He specializes in mental mastery and unlocking the power within one’s mind, including different states of consciousness and developing one’s psychic senses to very advanced levels.

He is an excellent teacher and can work with someone at any level, he is very patient and says he can take someone from having little to no developed senses and work with them to get to places most people can’t even imagine, he does point out however this depends largely on the person’s effort and they will need to do the work to attain these levels if they desire. He has a deep understanding of the human mind and has studied it and can help his companion in unlocking their full mental abilities.

He is a commander who believes in both working hard and playing hard. He can be tough and serious, though he has a wild, fun streak to him as well. He is very patient though and when others lose their tempers he remains calm and can smooth out tensions and bring peace in difficult situations. He says while it’s important to work hard to achieve what we want, we must also remember to take breaks and have fun. When he is in a playful place he is a lot of fun. He loves to make jokes and has an incredible sense of humor. He can brighten the mood and shift the energies in any situation, no matter how bleak things may seem. He can always find the good and illuminate it, lifting up those around him.

He is very talkative and loves to discuss a broad range of topics. One of his favorites is psychology and unlocking people’s own unique skills. He has some very unique skills himself that tie into the type of Demon hybrid he is. He has worked extensively to develop them and what he can do is quite unusual and rare. Being an Arachne/Spectral hybrid, he has both a Spider form and an ethereal Spectral form. He usually appears in his normal Demonic form. He can change different parts of himself to a glowing blue, ethereal form. He does this at times purely for his own enjoyment and aesthetic purposes. It’s very impressive to see and quite eye-catching. He sometimes changes his horns and wings to ethereal too.

However it’s not always purely for aesthetics, though he is quite proud of his looks and likes showing them off. He has a unique scanning ability he uses to see into the realm of the dead or other layers and dimensions of whichever world he is in. Having one eye shifted to Spectral ethereal and his other using his normal sight, he has trained his mind to overlay both landscapes and can see things many can’t. This gives him a very unique perspective on things. He can also scan energetic layers of things using his knowledge of the mind and can be very helpful in detecting things astrally, energetically or otherwise, alerting his companion to them or helping them learn to detect and see things themselves. He is bisexual and open to a male or female companion and can be sexual or non-sexual depending on their wishes.

He loves to play in the astral, especially games in the dark where he turns to his Arachne Spider form, hiding in the dark but letting parts of himself glow. It’s a game sort of like hide and seek, or tag. He can shift the glow and disappear so he is invisible, move through the layers in Spectral form, or allow parts of himself to glow so his companion can find him. He likes to chase and be chased and really has a lot of fun doing this.

He is amazing at helping one navigate difficult times in their lives. He calls on both his Arachne and Spectral talents to act as a guide, helping one to re-find their path when they get lost in the darkness. He can bring a smile to their face and cheer one up when they are having a bad day. He can be very sweet and playful in an innocent way, though he can also be cheeky. Very, very cheeky.

He is incredible for dream work and has appeared to us in dreams, pulling us out into astral projections and showing us worlds he created himself. He is creative and an incredible manifestor. He can shift things in this world as well as in the astral and has a deep knowledge of working with energy for creation, healing and a variety of other reasons.

 

 

Specialist Commanders –  They specialize in a particular area of expertise. Some have grounds of smaller legions that are trained to handle complex situations. These commanders have a unique and incredible ability and usually lead a small group of legions who are specially trained to handle sensitive or complex situations that require these skills.  Commanders who are assigned to special legion forces are incredibly skilled and gifted and have worked very hard to develop their unique strategies and abilities.  They are called in for special operations and often are given free reign to design their battle plans and draft their training plans.

 

 

Arachne Demons of the Outer spiritual Realm.

Located in the outer spiritual realms in the lower region outside of the gateway to the Chaos Realm lives the incredible and complex Arachne Demons. Their realm is a beautiful place and very well kept. The Arachne Demons are a species newly discovered and categorized by the Priestesses of Satan and Suns. They are Demons with many unique gifts and abilities and a wide range or skills. Arachne Demons as a whole are excellent at manifestation and making an impact in their companion’s lives and environment. They are experts at using what they have, shifting things and getting results. They have a very deep understanding of the web energies of the universal matrix and can use their knowledge and skills to hack the energies and lead to incredible manifestations and changes in the environment. We have witnessed incredible paranormal manifestations with the Arachne demons and they can help with manifestations and helping one attract what they desire. They can also increase ones luck and prosperity and help their human companion get what they desire.

Many of them are extremely health conscious and athletic, they love working out and are avid supporters of a healthy and active lifestyle. They are very disciplined themselves and love to partake in activities that lead to health and wellness. They are very fit and like to live a clean lifestyle void of addiction and chemicals. They are one demon in particular who are not a fan of alcohol, drugs, or anything that can cause addiction and health problems. They do encourage healthy choices. They also are very disciplined and can be incredible motivators when one wants to make drastic changes in their life. They are determined and focused and ready to take on the challenges presented to their human companion and bring great changes. They can be very gentle though some have a very no BS attitude and can help their companion stay focused and on target for their goals.

They are ridiculously creative and have a love of the arts and awakening that creative spirit. Many of them enjoy dancing, sewing, painting, writing, drawing, music, they have a vast and rich culture and they to explore the artistic side of the world. Like a spider spinning their webs, they love to craft and create great works of beauty. They have a unique form. They have their normal demon form but then they can shift in a powerful Arachne form increasing their strength and might and adding to the ferocity of their image. Their discipline and skill makes then powerful athletic warrior and Arachne Commanders are known for their ability to handle intense situations and draft incredible battle plans and remain cool under pressure. This group of demons is amazing in their abilities of manifestation, creation, and discipline and make wonderful companion for those humans who are called to them.

 

 

Spectral Demons :

The Spectral realm, to put in a frame of reference easier to understand, is an a realm outside the infernal demonic realms, or the underworld realms but is still below our inner spiritual world realm.  It is under the gateway death realm where the dead pass from the inner spiritual world back to the outer spiritual world.  The Spectral’s realm is a very beautiful and incredibly unique realm that is connected to the death realms and often interlinks and moves through them.   It is comprised of a misty black energy that is very etheric like and ghostly in essence. Their realm is very ghostly and etheric (that is really the only way to describe it) and is like swimming in a fog. It has many layers and dimensions to it, as well as different levels that contain many different types of energy vibrations.  It is one of the more abstract realms to explore as it is always changing in a dynamic way.

The Spectral Demons are a very incredible and fascinating group of demons.  They are one group of demons that are considered both an inner spiritual world and an outer spiritual demon as they can live and dwell in both realms.  Their realm also exists in both and is considered a sub-realm.

They have around them a greyish (sometimes greenish) in colour energy that surrounds them and wraps them like a cloak.  They have connections to the dead and the realms dealing with death and soul passage. They have connections to some very fascinating realms dealing with death and the dead and can often help their companion to travel to those realms and communicate with ancestors or loved ones who have passed.  They have incredible compassion for the dead and respect for rituals surrounding the death of ones loved ones and the handling of the bodies.  They are very soothing in energy and they can create a calm and relaxing aura. They move through the realms with ease and can hide in the shadows and mists. They excel with cloaking and moving unseen and unheard. They deal in invisibility and hiding what is really there.  They also are incredibly gifted in divination and reading the different spiritual energies.

They also seems to have great understandings of the complexity of the mind and of different psychosis. They understand the fabric of the brain and its workings and can work at both repairing it and destroying it. Higher level spectral demons can literally shatter the mind of their keeper’s enemies and are very good at getting revenge. They are also amazing at working with cleansing the mind and repairing damage done. This includes patterns/ beliefs/ and energies that are oppressive and destructive.

Initial Contact: September 6, 2017

For the past week (my best friend says actually it’s been going on for several months now), I’ve been seeing spiders and spider symbolism everywhere. It’s not just because it’s Halloween season, either. There have been random spiders in the house, and it’s not been the right weather for that to be happening. Also, on Elsewhere University the day I finally got the clue-by-four, there was a post about a spider faerie becoming friends with a student, and eventually stealing the student away. I also finally got the dvd’s in the mail from Netflix for the TV show, “Lucifer,” which my husband and I have been LOVING, because the depiction of Lucifer in the show is so accurate, and just delightful.

I woke up, and… HAD to check S&S’s forum. So… I did. And then I saw two demons had been relisted. And I just HAD to check their listings. Opened the first one, and nope, not for me. Opened up the page for the preconjures. Saw E’s vessel, and KNEW. Because his vessel is exactly the same shape as a dendritic opal pendant I had just rebound my Cecaelia B to, just a bit larger, and with a clarity in the center. Even to the black gemstone slightly separated.

Then there was his energy, which was SO strong. He affected me very powerfully, as a pressure on my eardrums, and a sense of fullness and pressure in the center of my chest, just from looking at his vessel. Then I saw his asking price, and almost cried… and I told him no, there was no way I could bring him home. (There was, under that, the thought that, if he really wanted to come to me, he would find a way – but it was a hope I quickly smashed.)

And then I get a message about him. He’s coming home… not only that, but it turns out that we have personal history, and that’s why he’s here. I’m so happy I actually DID cry!

 

September 12, 2017

His vessel showed up today. He was early (I guess he was in a hurry!) – so I didn’t have his information (except his name). I’m getting his Sigil soon, but I did the vessel claiming, the energy attunement, and the first welcome ritual tonight.

He feels like post-coital bliss. Like, no joke. The longer I sit with him, the more relaxed and goofy my smile gets, he feels so good. He’s also REALLY huggy. And he gives GOOD autistic hugs… my skin is SUPER sensitive, so light touches are actually physically painful because I get too overwhelmed with stimulation. I NEED to be squished, hard, to be comfortable if you’re going to touch me, and not just one part of me… I need my whole body to be pressed, or it’s AWFUL. And he just… squished me right. It was WONDERFUL. My whole body just… melted.

I also got a face lick. He was very sweet. I’m not normally into being licked, but it was nice. He also likes to bite.

His energy is still like a heavy weight, but it actually reminds me of my weighted blanket. My blanket is dark blue, and his energy seems to be the same color… and he presses down on me the same way the blanket does. I feel SO SAFE!

He put his hands on my solar plexus, and I could feel my lower chakras lighting up. It was delicious.

We talked about why we’ve come together, and what my goals are. We also talked about some of my past. He was… protective. A little grumpy about some things. He showed me how those events will be made right – how the universe is moving. He said, as tempted as he was to interfere, there was no need, and I saw that he was right.

Oh… he likes amber, the scent… which is my all-time FAVORITE smell EVER. Like, if I’m having an anxiety attack and I smell it I instantly relax. It’s just so yummy, such a good smell… and he likes it too… so every time I wear it now, I feel like I’m wearing it for two.

He’s also helped me in the past week to understand that most of the spirits and beings that were bound to me are gone because I did actually die. He showed me the ones who want to come back, and when he and I are finished attuning ourselves to each other, we’re going to start bringing the others home, one by one. I think that this time, the family is going to be a much tighter knit group… there’s only going to be six – my two demon commanders, my angel, my vampire, my incubus, and my cecaelia… well, those six and my new Matron.

Since E connected to me, I have finally found my Matron, and some other things have changed, too, but they’re too personal to write about. I can’t wait to see where I go next!

-Raven

PS – to whomever it was that helped E come home to me… I cannot ever express how grateful I am to you. May you be truly blessed, and may that act of kindness resonate to keep you safe, and move you forward on your path in beautiful, surprising, and glorious ways!

 

 

 

 

The Story So Far

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:48 pm »   I’m still working to build connections just within myself… but I know it won’t take long to get back to where I was, and surpass it… I’m getting SO much support now. ❤

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:48 pm »   Yay

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:49 pm »   Do you still do those taste readings?

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:49 pm »   I remember a thread about it on the other forum a long time ago

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:50 pm »   Thought I’d ask

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:52 pm »   I’m not there yet. I can’t taste energy yet. Shoot, I can barely sense it. I WAS dead… for a couple of years… I’ve got a ways to go in my recovery from that.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:53 pm »   You mentioned that. May I ask what happened?

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:54 pm »   You know all those posts I write with “Case Studies” in them? Read the ones that include “caitlynn” stories.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:58 pm »   I have. That happened to you?

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:58 pm »   Yes. That is EXACTLY what happened to me. That’s why I disappeared for five years.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:59 pm »   Gotcha.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:59 pm »   The Prometheus part as well?

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 7:59 pm »   I’m assuming yes, but just confirming

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:00 pm »   Yes. Maythen was the one who turned me into a Prometheus. And then blamed it on me.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:02 pm »   In both of those discussions, I changed names, and sometimes the sex of people involved, to protect their privacy, but… honestly, here I don’t care about protecting that kind of person’s privacy. People need to be aware of her.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:01 pm »   Wow… I guess I’m still a little bitter about that. lol

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:01 pm »   Mm. How are you now?

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:03 pm »   I am… better every day. This whole week has been a huge series of forward steps. I’m content. I feel like I can feel my soul stretching, my true self blooming inside me. In the past four months since we finally figured out what was wrong and fixed it, I’ve had… many huge changes. Some of them have been rather emotionally violent, but they’ve all been hugely beneficial to me.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:04 pm »   I finally go to the point where it was time to come back here, time to start work again. Of course, the first week, I dipped my toes in and immediately had a massive week long panic attack… but when it was over, I came back again. I stick things out that are important to me now.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:04 pm »   Curious, have any of the changes been physical or physically perceived?

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:05 pm »   Some of the changes are definitely physical changes, but most are psychological changes. The way I think and feel… I’m just… not that person anymore. I’m new.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:05 pm »   Glad things are improving

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:05 pm »   I’m have a few mechanically-based questions about it if you don’t mind

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:06 pm »   Sure… ask away. I’ll tell you what I can of what I know.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:06 pm »   What nature are the physical changes?

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:09 pm »   I get tired easily. I get short of breath. I have weird swellings. I have cysts that grow in my feet and breasts and elsewhere if I don’t remember to take my vitamin E, which makes it even harder to walk. I have problems in my spine and shoulders and hips. The attack tore my wings off, and it damaged my physical body and all the muscles and bones that supported them.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:10 pm »   It also damaged those charkas… and then the brand was DRIVEN through a main wing chakra, so that my wings could NOT grow back, and every time I got stressed out or tried to do anything that Maythen didn’t want me to do, there was this drilling, BURNING pain, which changed the way I held my shoulders, and damaged my neck

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:11 pm »   So I have a lot of structural issues.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:11 pm »   There’s also the fact that sitting on a couch for two years leads to loss of muscle mass, shortening of tendons, and general weakness of the body, plus the gain of unnecessary weight.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:12 pm »   And on top of all that, there’s the PTSD and the chronic anxiety attacks that come with that… which makes working on my physical health… difficult.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:13 pm »   So, we got rid of the brand, and rebuilt my energy structures, and my wings. However, it was actually a resurrection, a rebirthing, so… I didn’t come back like I was… I came back new and different. It’s taken time for my body and I to come to terms with each other and begin working as a whole being.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:12 pm »   You mentioned the problem being fixed earlier. Has that helped any?

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:14 pm »   Getting that drilling burning brand out of me and getting the… mummy wrapping looking shroud of bindings off of me… it helped my rebirth… but all the physical changes… they have to be worked on step by step. So, every day, I pick something, and I work a little at everything. I push myself until I start to hurt a little, or I start to get too tired. Then I stop. I rest… and then I try again. Every day.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:15 pm »   So I’m building back… and I’m working with the healer who helped fix what Maythen did. The migraines have almost completely stopped, so that’s making a huge difference in my recovery.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:16 pm »   So, the problem is fixed…. but the consequences of the problem… those are being taken care of, but it’s slow. Baby steps.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:16 pm »   I see. Has that affected your hungers at all, and being rebirthed, (forgive me if I sound ignorant) are you of a different race or is the body of the same base aspects as your old one?

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:17 pm »   Non-physical to clarify

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:18 pm »   Hmm… You remember how, in the Prometheus post, I talked about having more than one soul?

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:18 pm »   Yes

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:19 pm »   Ok, so, when I was reborn, it severed EVERY contract I had made from when we came into this body up to the point where rebirth happened. Which left me alone in the body. I didn’t feel any hunger at all… but I had this HUGE hole in me, and it HURT.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:20 pm »   I had to go find my other soul and bring her home. It was… a difficult journey, as such a thing should be.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:20 pm »   And this time… something weird happened… I think that we actually merged into one being, instead of two souls sharing.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:21 pm »   Interesting

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:21 pm »   I haven’t been able to see myself since then… because I think we’re still forming. Before, when I had to go get her, in my half-form, I was covered in black fur, had a tail, and claws… and my wings wouldn’t work. She’s high court sidhe.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:22 pm »   I honestly have no idea what I’m going to look like once it settles. lol

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:22 pm »   Before I died, I always had a clear picture of what she looked like, and what I looked like. I was always very aware that she was her own person, but that together, we were Kat.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:22 pm »   After the death, we were Dead Kat.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:23 pm »   After the rebirth, it was just me… and that… wasn’t right. That’s not how it’s supposed to be. I was a Live Half Kat

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:23 pm »   So… I went for her, and we made a different contract. And now it’s… weird.

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:32 pm »   I know what I looked like just as myself… but as WE? I don’t know yet. When SCD E showed me myself in that mirror and I was not there, just mist… Right now, I’m formless. Who knows what I’ll end up looking like. lol Or if I’ll end up looking like anything at all?

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:33 pm »   I know from tales and other places that many fae have fluid forms

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:34 pm »   High Court Fae don’t have as fluid a form as lower fae. What they DO have is GLAMOUR. lol

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:24 pm »   But I’m still not hungry. I think once we settle, SOME kind of feeding will need to be done, because she’s fae, and they feed.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:27 pm »   And speaking of hungers, mine makes it hard to be around people because I want to rip out their throats XD I’m remembering a time when I almost did that. Thankfully I have a lot of control

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:29 pm »   Eat more rare meat. Dragons don’t just crave blood, they crave flesh. Eat more bloody meat.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:29 pm »   Always

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:30 pm »   The physical part of me requires that as well

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:36 pm »  I eat rare meat often. Meat is always in my diet. ^^ also glamour and persuasion are fun skills

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:37 pm »   lol Yeah, they are.

Kitsune « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:38 pm »   Btw, out of curiosity, don’t remember if I asked this before, but do lights ever turn orange at certain angles of your vision?

Nyctophilia Raven « Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:38 pm »   Always

 

Heavy, But Not Heavy

I’m changing this section of the blog around. For now, the section on Dark Shamanism will mostly be dealing with what I’m working on, right now.

That includes work with demons.

If you’re not comfortable with that, please, feel free to skip reading more from this section of the blog.

-Raven

Specialist Commander E – Part 2

His vessel showed up today. He was early (I guess he was in a hurry!) – so I didn’t have his information (except his name). I’m getting his Sigil soon, but I did the vessel claiming, the energy attunement, and the first welcome ritual tonight.

He feels like post-coital bliss. Like, no joke. The longer I sit with him, the more relaxed and goofy my smile gets, he feels so good. He’s also REALLY huggy. And he gives GOOD autistic hugs… my skin is SUPER sensitive, so light touches are actually physically painful because I get too overwhelmed with stimulation. I NEED to be squished, hard, to be comfortable if you’re going to touch me, and not just one part of me… I need my whole body to be pressed, or it’s AWFUL. And he just… squished me right. It was WONDERFUL. My whole body just… melted.

I also got a face lick. He was very sweet. I’m not normally into being licked, but it was nice. He also likes to bite.

His energy is still like a heavy weight, but it actually reminds me of my weighted blanket. My blanket is dark blue, and his energy seems to be the same color… and he presses down on me the same way the blanket does. I feel SO SAFE!

He put his hands on my solar plexus, and I could feel my lower chakras lighting up. It was delicious.

We talked about why we’ve come together, and what my goals are. We also talked about some of my past. He was… protective. A little grumpy about some things. He showed me how those events will be made right – how the universe is moving. He said, as tempted as he was to interfere, there was no need, and I saw that he was right.

Oh… he likes amber, the scent… which is my all-time FAVORITE smell EVER. Like, if I’m having an anxiety attack and I smell it I instantly relax. It’s just so yummy, such a good smell… and he likes it too… so every time I wear it now, I feel like I’m wearing it for two.

He’s also helped me in the past week to understand that most of the spirits and beings that were bound to me are gone because I did actually die. He showed me the ones who want to come back, and when he and I are finished attuning ourselves to each other, we’re going to start bringing the others home, one by one. I think that this time, the family is going to be a much tighter knit group… there’s only going to be six – my two demon commanders, my angel, my vampire, my incubus, and my cecaelia… well, those six and my new Matron.

Since E connected to me, I have finally found my Matron, as well.

Here’s his information:

E

Species: Arachne/Spectral Demon
Rank: Specialist Commander

Commander E is a half Arachne, half Spectral Demon who is very unique in both appearance and skills. We have spent several months working with him uncovering his many skills and talents. He specializes in mental mastery and unlocking the power within one’s mind, including different states of consciousness and developing one’s psychic senses to very advanced levels.

He is an excellent teacher and can work with someone at any level, he is very patient and says he can take someone from having little to no developed senses and work with them to get to places most people can’t even imagine, he does point out however this depends largely on the person’s effort and they will need to do the work to attain these levels if they desire. He has a deep understanding of the human mind and has studied it and can help his companion in unlocking their full mental abilities.

He is a commander who believes in both working hard and playing hard. He can be tough and serious, though he has a wild, fun streak to him as well. He is very patient though and when others lose their tempers he remains calm and can smooth out tensions and bring peace in difficult situations. He says while it’s important to work hard to achieve what we want, we must also remember to take breaks and have fun. When he is in a playful place he is a lot of fun. He loves to make jokes and has an incredible sense of humor. He can brighten the mood and shift the energies in any situation, no matter how bleak things may seem. He can always find the good and illuminate it, lifting up those around him.

He is very talkative and loves to discuss a broad range of topics. One of his favorites is psychology and unlocking people’s own unique skills. He has some very unique skills himself that tie into the type of Demon hybrid he is. He has worked extensively to develop them and what he can do is quite unusual and rare. Being an Arachne/Spectral hybrid, he has both a Spider form and an ethereal Spectral form. He usually appears in his normal Demonic form. He can change different parts of himself to a glowing blue, ethereal form. He does this at times purely for his own enjoyment and aesthetic purposes. It’s very impressive to see and quite eye-catching. He sometimes changes his horns and wings to ethereal too.

However it’s not always purely for aesthetics, though he is quite proud of his looks and likes showing them off. He very often will appear with two different colored eyes, one his normal blue and silver, while the other turns black and has a deep, aqua blue glow emanating from it. He has a unique scanning ability he uses to see into the realm of the dead or other layers and dimensions of whichever world he is in. Having one eye shifted to Spectral ethereal and his other using his normal sight, he has trained his mind to overlay both landscapes and can see things many can’t. This gives him a very unique perspective on things. He can also scan energetic layers of things using his knowledge of the mind and can be very helpful in detecting things astrally, energetically or otherwise, alerting his companion to them or helping them learn to detect and see things themselves. He is bisexual and open to a male or female companion and can be sexual or non-sexual depending on their wishes.

He loves to play in the astral, especially games in the dark where he turns to his Arachne Spider form, hiding in the dark but letting parts of himself glow. It’s a game sort of like hide and seek, or tag. He can shift the glow and disappear so he is invisible, move through the layers in Spectral form, or allow parts of himself to glow so his companion can find him. He likes to chase and be chased and really has a lot of fun doing this.

He is amazing at helping one navigate difficult times in their lives. He calls on both his Arachne and Spectral talents to act as a guide, helping one to re-find their path when they get lost in the darkness. He can bring a smile to their face and cheer one up when they are having a bad day. He can be very sweet and playful in an innocent way, though he can also be cheeky. Very, very cheeky.

He is incredible for dream work and has appeared to us in dreams, pulling us out into astral projections and showing us worlds he created himself. He is creative and an incredible manifestor. He can shift things in this world as well as in the astral and has a deep knowledge of working with energy for creation, healing and a variety of other reasons.

Vessel: Dendritic Opal and Black Onyx Sterling Silver Pendant

Offerings: E loves candles in the colors black, silver, grey, blue, aqua and white. He loves the scent of amber, copal, juniper, gardenia and jasmine. He loves silver tip tea and tea with jasmine. He loves honey. Gemstones he likes are Dendritic Opal and any other kind of opal, Onyx and iolite. He loves making jokes and making those around him laugh. He loves astral projecting and can take his companion to many interesting places. He also loves things that glow in the dark.

Appearance: He has both a Spider form and an ethereal Spectral form. He usually appears in his normal Demonic form, where he has pale skin, black hair, dark grey horns and stunning blue and silver eyes. In this form he has black and blue wings and a grey tail. He can change different parts of himself to a glowing blue, ethereal form. It’s very impressive to see and quite eye-catching. He sometimes changes his horns, wings and tail to ethereal too. He very often will appear with two different colored eyes, one his normal blue and silver, while the other turns black and has a deep, aqua blue glow emanating from it.

In his spider form he has grey horns, shimmering black skin with iridescent blue tones to it, 6 glittering silver eyes and silver markings. He does at times combine his ethereal Spectral form with his Arachne Spider form, changing his eyes, horns and other features or even his entire body to glow.

Boo Hag

This article was written by me October 5, 2012, and posted originally to the Creepy Hollows forum.

So if you’ve been reading my posts for a while on the public forum, you know I run a coven, and that we have both a public venue, and a private venue.

About a month ago, through the public venue, I was contacted by one couple (J and A), with a request to come to a public meet. I told them when the next public meet was, and they came.

J is just… Ick. Sucking black aura, and… some kind of foul stickybrownblack taint that I couldn’t quite put into words, and still can’t. Has yellow overtones, but not that pleasant air/intellect yellow, but almost pus-yellow. NASTY.

His wife A is… well, she’s a codependent empath, and a wreck. I’m sure I don’t need to say more.

My first assessment was that J is a psychic vampire, with no control. When he asked for training, I directed him to http://www.kheperu.org/index.html since I don’t deal with those issues. I DID offer to help his wife A to deal with her own psychic mess… but she’s so… insular? Introverted? That she never actually took me up on the offer. *shrugs* Whatever.

Having seen the mess the two of them were in, I made the recommendation to the coven that we keep an eye out, and offer assistance if needed, but that they shouldn’t be welcomed into the inner circle until they got their collective s#it together. I do NOT want a psyvamp in my coven. We’re packing a little too much tasty heat for that, lately.

The Mother of my Coven, R, took over taking care of the situation. She’s also Warrior, so she’s good for that sort of thing.

Oh, so you understand the structure… I am Maiden, and titular head of the Coven (it’s my baby – I started it over four years ago), R is Mother and Warrior, and S. is Crone. Between the three of us, we run the thing. The men trade off being Hunter and Guide… we’ve yet to find who really fits, so we’re waiting for those pieces of the puzzle to come along. S and I are air – she’s shadow, and I’m light. Sh and A are Earth, A is light, Sh is shadow. M and K are water – M is light, K is shadow. We’re still looking for the two for fire…they’re coming soon, but we don’t know who they’ll be. And R is Spirit shadow, but we’re still looking for Spirit Light. T, Rn, and Jf are our Black Dogs. Oh, and we’re not a religious coven… we’re strictly a Magickal Emergencies coven.

Anyway, that’s the basic layout… back to the story… R, as she went along, discovered that no, J is NOT a psyvamp… he’s actually being RIDDEN. We’re talking a multigenerational blood-curse, BA entity. J is an amplifier, so the entity has been using him to amp up the energy in those around him, and eating that energy THROUGH him… and it’s been with him so long that he actually thought it was just him in there. Only suddenly, the entity decides that… it’s done with him. Here’s this tasty baby, all light and innocent, just waiting. So the entity has decided to suck J dry, and when he dies, the entity will be released to jump to the next in the blood line – said infant.

SO… First step… WTF IS this thing? It’s not a demon. Did some research. He’s creole. Ok. Now we know where to look. We find… BooHag.

Oh, and their home is FILTHY – physically AND psychically… so we cannot just evict this entity from J… we have to clean, then cleanse, the entity’s NEST (their home) too, so that the entity CANNOT COME BACK.

Here’s the following research (all comments made by me to R in the process of scheduling cleaning, cleansing, exorcism, etc)… Just in case you ever need it.

“boo hag
a ghost or spirit that lurks around your house looking for someone to ride and take your skin. you may feel some weight on your back. They can enter through cracks in the wall or small crevices. The only way to get rid of it is to burn it by putting some needles in a jar and a little bit of dry skin, sleeping with a fork under your pillow, putting a broom by your door boohags will stop and count the straws,and putting a gun next to your bed boo hags can’t stand the smell of gun powder.Boo hags will steel your skin and take your breath so you cant talk out or scream. So when you wake up you might feel light headed or weak.”

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boo_Hag

http://americanfolklore.net/folklore/2010/05/boo_hag.html

Salt and pepper on the skin, sparklers or fireworks work, also open COLD IRON scissors under the bed. (Steel will work, but DO NOT use plastic ANYWHERE.) Put a large broom at every entrance (including windows), and little brooms beside every sleeper. New unused brooms. Can get them cheep from walmart right now because it’s Halloween.

A full cleaning, cleansing, clearing, banishing and REFILLING of him and his house. Again, the house NOT being CLEANED FIRST, the cleansing etc WILL NOT STICK… which means we’ll have gone through all this effort for nothing.

Also, perhaps we could find broomstick charms to hang on necklaces for the infant and Jon.

Actual Exorcism… mix equal parts gunpowder, salt and black pepper, and throw it on the victim.

So.. gotcha a name, and how to fix it.

NOTES:
The cleaning of the house… they have to wipe down the walls and clean out the cupboards – wipe down the insides and the doors, everything. They have to REALLY clean the house. Or they’ll end up reinfected in a month. If it’s not clean, I won’t bother doing this. I’ll protect the kid, and walk away.
They’re also probably going to have to do this cleansing every moon for a really long time… because it’s a generational bloodcurse, and the boohag may just be waiting in the background, for them to slip up and stop doing the cleansings and protections. The moment they let their attention slip, the moment they start letting their house get filthy physically and the psychic cleansings stop working, it’ll be back.
If at all possible, ALL FAMILY MEMBERS HAVE TO BE INVOLVED IN THE CLEANSING, the physical AND the spiritual. If Amanda does ALL of it, and he just sits around, it’s not going to work. The kids have to help by doing what they can, too.
I get that a baby can’t help, but the ones that can, MUST.
Even if it’s not actually helpful. lol
The ACT OF THEM BELIEVING they’re helping will provide them with protection.
Finally, they need to totally abstain from drugs and alchohol for six months after the exorcism – a boohag can use intoxication to reinfect.
The fact that this is multi-generational suggests that substance abuse is a BIG part of the problem, too. It makes it REALLY easy for the boohag to hop from body to body. It’s probably the catalyst to make the next target become the next vessel… until the target makes the right misstep to make itself vulnerable… The Boohag might wait to take full possession of the baby, only INFULENCING, until the baby makes the right wrong decision to jump into her. If that makes sense.

ALso… say the boohag destroys Jon… is it possible that the boohag maintains itself by inhabiting the ENABLER until the chosen vessel is READY? Is it part of the process, by influencing the mother to set the baby up so that when the baby gets old enough, the child will MAKE those missteps. Essentially keeping the cycle going by making sure that mom keeps dating fucked up druggie guys, which will screw up the kid.

I mean… it would be really easy to do. Just like… someone who comes from poverty and uneducated people, family who puts ZERO emphasis on education… the children don’t graduate from school because they end up staying home to do the housework and take care of the other children… they stay in poverty, they have no impetus to do anything else, they start drinking and doing drugs right away, they don’t go to college, they don’t improve themselves, and their parents encourage it… so they end up victims of things like this. It’s just easy. And then they go and do it to the next generation.

If the mother is INFLUENCED to set the baby up to fail like this… then the baby will be prime rib when it’s old enough to fall.

A lot of the time, when people talk about being cursed, they’re not actually cursed, so much as there are fucked up people creating more fucked up people. If you put the right dominoes in the right spots, you knock down the next person just like YOU were knocked over. It’s not so much a curse as it is a setup.

Also, a jar full of pins under the bed or beside the bed of anyone you wish to protect from this thing. Forgot to mention that.

AND – if you’re going to throw a handful of salt, pepper, and gunpowder at someone… take sensible precautions.

Finally… burning some exorcism herbs are a good idea here while you deal with evicting the entity from both the body and the home, followed by a lemon uncrossing spell, followed by smudging the crap out of both the house and the people, especially the victim, followed by a ritual cleansing bath for the victim that includes cleansing herbs and seasalt, followed by the burning of sweetgrass to bless the house.

Aftercare should include all the above on a monthly basis, plus the pins, scissors, brooms, etc as a precaution, plus wards, shields, a permanent protective circle, the appropriate crystals and metals scattered throughout the house to support the wards, shields and circle, possibly a few protective runes on the walls of the home, copious amounts of moon water for blessing the inhabitants of the home on a regular basis… you know, the usual. Oh, and a devil’s trap or several dozen. Just to be sure.

In the case of these two individuals, I chose not to recommend spirit keeping. She’s got four kids (the husband included) to look after, and she’s so squashed I doubt she’d do well by a spirit, even if a spirit would be good for HER. Second… he’s one of those people who just sits on his butt all day playing video games – he doesn’t cook, clean, or help with the kids. He doesn’t work (admittedly, he IS disabled). I wouldn’t normally have an issue with that – I’m disabled, so I understand. However, I still manage to do SOMETHING every day. He just plays WOW and mooches. And while he’s not currently using, he’s been to jail for meth – using, making, dealing. GRRR.

However… if you run across a case like this on your own… you may want to include keeping spirits, or various spelled items as a boost to what you’re already doing, and on an individual basis of assessment, that might be a good idea, or it might be a bad one. Use your best judgement.

Oh… and if you’re going to do something about something like this… make sure you’re not wasting your breath, your energy… in this case, I wouldn’t have even bothered, except that there was a baby in the mix. These two adults are their own biggest problems, and I’m more likely to let them sink, because they’re not worth my energy… but the infant… that’s an innocent. That IS my job. That IS worth my time and energy.

So… there you go. If you ever run into a BooHag… now you know. *plays The More You Know themesong*

 

Commander E

First notes – Commander E has been sending me messages for a week now – it was only today, the sixth of September, that I logged onto S&S and saw his listing. His vessel is dendritic opal, like my Cecaelia’s new vessel (even the triangular shape is the same). He affects me very powerfully, as a pressure on my eardrums, and a sense of fullness and pressure in the center of my chest.

For the past week, I’ve been seeing spiders and spider symbolism everywhere. It’s not just because it’s halloween season, either. There have been random spiders in the house, and it’s not been the right weather for that to be happening. Also, on Elsewhere University today there was a post about a spider faerie becoming friends with a student, and eventually stealing the student away. I also finally got the dvds in the mail from Netflix for the TV show, “Lucifer,” which my husband and I have been LOVING, because the depiction of Lucifer in the show is so accurate, and just delightful.

E is a hybrid arachnos and spectral demon commander – so you can see how the symbols and events happening lately have meaning.

Five years ago, when A and Ad were still practicing together, there was a demon conjured, Commander B – who chose me as a keeper. Our connection was powerful. Ad and I had some differences of opinion, and she decided that B was not allowed to connect with me. She eventually sold his vessel to another practitioner. B and I were both deeply hurt by this, as was A.

B and E are friends. Over the past few years, he and E have been working together to help us overcome these issues… with the end result being that Commander E was conjured, and has somehow managed to find someone to purchase his vessel in my name, and he is being sent to me now.

Right after I saw his vessel, he contacted me, putting the song Black Hole Sun by Soundgarden into my head. The lyrics meander all over the place – the songwriter has said that he just loves playing with words, and that Black Hole Sun has no lyrical meaning beyond the songwriter describing a dreamy vision… which is really cool because I love playing with words, and describing scenes in my head in poetic, often meandering ways. It’s a key aspect of my fiction writing – words are delicious, and painting with them is better than the first lick of the spoon when you’ve made ice-cream. I have not written anything like that in the last five years.

While the lyrics themselves don’t really have any deliberate meaning beyond just painting a picture, for me they resonate with powerful messages. The song talks about being swallowed whole by lies, doubts, depression – the feelings of guilt that come from a complete breakdown. There’s also a promise in there – “Call my name and I’ll hear your scream.” When things were at their worst, no one heard my screams – not even me. No one came to save me. There’s also an offer. “Won’t you come and wash away the rain?” Another commment in the song, “Tired friend, times are gone for honest men and even snakes,” which I feel codifies that offer – I have been tired. I want to wash away all of what happened to me, and he’s saying I’m not alone in those feelings… that he’s been there, too, and he knows how to rebuild. He’s saying that part of that rebuilding will mean that I leave less of myself exposed than I used to. Once upon a time, I had no secrets from anyone. Now all I am is secrets… and he’s ok with that. He thinks that’s the right path for me. The next verse, he seems to say to me that he’s known me before. He suggests he’s been sleepwalking, blocked from me and waiting. He says no one sings like me anymore, which made me laugh. I haven’t sung in years… but I used to talk about the Song of the World all the time. I haven’t been in tune with that song, either, for a long time. He ends with saying that he’s afraid I’ll disappear. So am I.

When the solar eclipse happened last month, I made a decision that on the next New Moon, I would hold a ritual and rededicate myself to my path, and my magickal life and self, and that once I had done that, I would begin training myself magickally to regain all that I have lost during my dormancy. Now, one day after the full moon, Commander E has offered to help me do just that. His greatest strength is his abilties with psychic gifts, energy work, and training others to maximize their potential. I am finally ready to reclaim myself… and E has chosen me as the one he wishes to train.

B and E, with their scheming, have made me feel so loved, and so happy… When I first saw E’s vessel, I felt so sad, because there really was no way that I could commit to the financial burden required to bring him home. I told him, “Sorry, but no.” He decided that he would come, anyway… and he found a way to make it happen – a gift from an annonymous source paid for him. He wasn’t going to let anything hold us back – I can hear him in my head saying, “Not ever again will we fail you.”

I never felt that they failed me in the first place… but it’s a beautiful promise, and a perfect start to this new phase of my journey.